Sleep

"That I would never, ever, sleep..."

Sleep

By: Ethan West

Swift winds run on unseen feet

Through beauty’s wood life takes the leap

From battle cry to battled bleat

To lead me now to distant sleep

Water falls but is seen not

Under worlds of steam to forest steep

And in this place they bring the thought

To lead me now to peaceful sleep

But it takes a boy to make a man

In restless mind I made a plan

That I would lie in beauty deep

And I would never, ever, sleep

Author's Note

It's finally happened. The legal wall has fallen on digital publishing of my works. This is one of the 70 poems from my book "A Winter Walk," please let me know what you think. I'll post a couple others tonight I'd love to get your opinion. This poem has not won any contests however it is a personal favorite of one of my closest friends. Hope you like it!

Reviews

[Baby Ricochet]

The first stanza made me think of the old Greek myths. Like Hermes flying around the woods while the satyrs bone nymphs by the waterfalls. Maybe I need medication, I don't know. Besides all that this was a great poem. Actually that's what made it a great poem. THanks Bro!!

[ewest1220]

lol well said I think XD thanks for reading man I'm glad you enjoyed my work!

[Japanese Cherry]

it was short, but it wonderful... love reading your work.

[ewest1220]

Thanks!

[Japanese Cherry]

my pleasure

[rnuff]

Such a wonderful write, love the rhyme scheme and flow.
Amazing. It's a emotional read with depth. Like it.

[ewest1220]

Thanks! I'm really glad you liked it!

[David Michael]

I find it interesting that you change your rhyme scheme from ABAB to AABB. Why? For a specific purpose of effect? Or just because that's how the lines wanted to go? I can go along with the former - the latter I have a harder time swallowing.

I do like this one too. I tend to like contemplative pieces, specifically tranquil ones (because I realize you can contemplate on something not terribly tranquil...).

Thanks for sharing some of your published stuff!

[ewest1220]

I wanted to create a transitional finality to the last line. Something that reflected the sudden difference in perspective and accented the last stanza. Also I'm usually so rigid in my rhyme pattern so it was nice to sort of break away and try something different. But hey I'm really thrilled you enjoyed my work thank you so much for reading! It's nice to hear from you!

[David Michael]

oK, that makes sense. I figured it was for the purpose of emphasizing the stanza. Just had to check!

I honestly don't see anything bad or lacking about being "rigid", or maybe for a more positive spin, true to, a rhyme scheme. BUT, I do understand the desire to "jazz" things up as it were. Looking back, even in my first attempt at poetry, "Beauty", which is entirely too long and not terribly original, I was unable to be boxed in by a single rhyme scheme or meter. But back to yours, I think poems that remain faithful to a rhyme scheme, and maintain interest and energy while doing so, are quite admirable.

[ewest1220]

I agree with you on both counts, if that makes sense

[_]

WAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!! It was so beautifully written *stand up and claps insanely and then stops to see people looking at me weirdly....sits down automatically* It had a great flow! And so nicely penned. I loved it :D

[ewest1220]

Aww! I'm not sure what to say aside from thank you so much! I'm really thrilled you enjoyed this thank you so much for reading my work :D

[The dark story]

well.that was too nice.it's so beautifully written.i liked the last stanza a lot.
"But it takes a boy to make a man"....that line is just so true and meaningful.i liked it so much..your works are great as ever!!.

[ewest1220]

Thanks Atiba! It's always nice to hear from you I'm thrilled you liked this!

[william keepers]

The transition of transcendance I see, though not entirely comfortably. The second line of the last stanxa stands out for it is the only line written in past tense, all others are in the present. Obviously the plan was successful or this poem would not be.

Excellent!

[ewest1220]

Thank you for the very insightful analysis of my work! I'm thrilled you enjoyed it thank you so much for reading!

[SnuggleBunnyQueen]

I absolutely loved this poem! I would love to get your opinion on some of my works. They are not as good as yours but your writing is pure inspiration to become better. I would love to read more of your works though!

[ewest1220]

I looked over some of your stuff :) I'll need to wait until I have some extra time to really read your works since they're chapters and such but I'd love to have a look! Thank you so much for reading!

[kublakhan27]

Lush and imaginative, signature traits of your work without question...love it^^

[ewest1220]

Thanks ^_^ I'm really glad you enjoyed my work!

[kublakhan27]

You're very welcome :)

[.]

Short and brilliant. This is such a great poem.

[ewest1220]

Thanks ^_^

[ba_mcfarlane]

This work, for me is an almost dirge to the recalibrating of what one wants, as one approaches full maturity. The innocent naivety of the flawed goals of a callow youth, evolve as new dreams are forged in reality, and recast in the shapes to be found in the writer's caldron of experience. In the last stanza, the acceptance of the poet's mortality discovered in middle years, that is a crashing summation.
This is how this works for this man, fast approaching old age.
Brilliant stuff. Love it.

[ewest1220]

Wow thank you so much for this fresh insight on my writing! I'm really thrilled you enjoyed it thank you again for reading my friend!