Chapter 4: An Ominous Sign

Chapter 4: An Ominous Sign

Issak headed back towards the clearing where the ruins of the town once stood. As he neared the forest edge, however, he smelled something strange. The burning of several fires and horse droppings had created a thick putrid aroma that made his head spin. He slowly approached the clearing. But what he saw before him was so inconvenient it made his head spin in fury.

Tens of thousands of soldiers had camped in the disheveled town. An Amas flag flying high over the scattered tents and dancing flames.

“What are they doing here?” Issak thought to himself. “Why would they bring so many soldiers? What's their goal?”

His mind drifted away into frustrated thought. He stared off into space for some time but could think of nothing. He lifted himself back onto his feet and turned to leave.

But just then his tired eyes caught the form of someone sprinting toward the camp. Anger flared up inside Issak's mind like white hot coals against his heart. It was the woman from the clearing. And judging by the way she was running he was about to be exposed.

Issak groaned with suppressed fury. He wanted to catch her, to stop her somehow. To kill her before she made it to the camp, something!

“No,” he thought sadly looking at his blood soaked clothes. “I've sinned enough today.”

He would head toward the great city of Shenok Duhl. It was nearby and it was also one of the few cities that hadn't fallen under the control of the Amas. There, at least, he may be able to rest in peace. He turned and ran away from the clearing, nerves ablaze from the thought of the upcoming pursuit.

Author's Note

Another short chapter, however I saw this, again, as an important angle to set up. What do you think?

Reviews

[Yheela]

Brill!
What does the camp look like?
Is it organised into neat lines? Or just a couple of tents dumped all over the place? The soldiers? Are they as rough as the ones in the forest?

Is there anything about Elizabeth running that catches his eye more? Her hair streaming behind her? Her cloak tangling her legs?

[ewest1220]

Also brilliant. Those are places I can absolutely expand on to make this sound better! Thank you so much!

[Rhea752]

i liked the emotion. nicely done

[ewest1220]

Thanks!

[FantasyLover24601]

Great chapter! However, I agree with a couple of other reviewers that it needs some more details. I know that fantasy novels are hard to build from the ground up, especially when the world you're writing about is one of your own creation and not a well known place in the real world.

[ewest1220]

I'm actually glad that people are saying this. It gives me a fantastic place to go to once I get everything revised :) I'm really glad you enjoyed this FantasyLover your input is always greatly appreciated!

[FantasyLover24601]

Thank you and you're welcome!

[∠( ᐛ 」..]

Amazing chapter!
100/100

[ewest1220]

Thanks!

[Junert]

No comments, would sum it up at chapter seven.

[ewest1220]

Sounds good!

[Poison Ivy]

i agree with one of the comments below! brilliant! lol

[ewest1220]

Sweet! Glad you liked it Poison Ivy!

[Uc Amalu]

a rather short chapter I must say.. I have to agree with Yheela that the descriptive writing isn't too detailed. I haven't read the previous chapters but the story is captivating. Thanks for sharing

[ewest1220]

Very true I plan to go back once I get the whole story up on here. That way I can really hammer this one out perfectly. Thanks for reading my friend I'm glad you enjoyed it!

[Coyote Poetry]

I like the thoughts of Issak. I like the desire to escape and find peace for a moment. A very good chapter. Allow the story to have some calm for a moment. A excellent chapter.
Coyote

[ewest1220]

Thanks! I'm really glad you liked it Coyote!