On My Deathbed

On My Deathbed

By: Ethan West

     "If it were to be that I was damned at birth I would beg you tell me the cause.  What caused me to be sentenced to death even before I had the power to breathe the sweet air of the world that had not yet exposed itself to my blind eyes?  

     Before I was even able to form thought I was doomed to die.  I am an elderly man, death is knocking at my doorstep and I am afraid.  Why was I brought into this world only to be ripped from it at the very instant I had grown accustomed to it's joys and sorrows.

     But my tired and desperate eyes hide truth even in their search for it.  For my life was a plague on myself.  I had seen nothing but pain and hurt.  Yet at the same time I am drawn to that miserable heaven, that delightful hell that was my life and I don't wish to relieve my grasp.

     I was a young man once, long ago it seems.  I saw, and became a child.  I learned, and became a boy.  I stood up, and became a teenager.  I loved, and became a man.

    Who was it who caught my love so, you might ask?  She was radiance all in herself, she was beauty and grace.  She held my heart with hands of silk and fashioned it into her own with the grace of an angel.  She was my everything, she was my only thing.

     I fell to her beauty but she did not fall to my charm for I was still but a teenager.  Somberly I look back on my foolish attempts to woo her into my arms.  My discontent went with any one person but her.  For even when I found another she stole away the light from their eyes that had led me to them into the first place.  All the while becoming more bright and beautiful while I stayed as I was, just a teenager.

     When she finally invited me into her heart it was as if I had stepped unwittingly into a void as deep and wonderful as the beauteous night sky looking down on the hatred of man with omniscient pity and simple grace.  But I was, just a teenager, unworthy to look upon such beauty.  So I shied away from what I had sought for so long, fear in my heart, and failure in my stride.

     It was then that I learned of a darker side to her beauty.  A deep secret that lured her to death in spite of the peace that seemed never-ending in her smile.  I saw it within tired eyes a plot to take her life.  I cursed at the hell I had thrown my love within and the turmoil it had caused my weak and pitiful soul.

     I could shy away no longer for my affection was great.  And her need was far greater.  We fell in love and the thoughts of suicide seemed to leave her smile.  Lost in the beauty of her eyes which shone brightly in mine.  All other thoughts were erased from the world in that moment and in many more moments to come.

     I proposed to her some five years later, and we were wed under the stars.  Within our kiss was hope, happiness, and a love that seemed to be never-ending.  She stared into my eyes as I stared equally into hers.  "I now pronounce you man and wife," I smiled, and so did she.  We turned to face our families who were applauding tearfully at the beautiful sight of love completed within the gentle vows of marriage.

     My heart lifted, I had found the one.  I felt something cold brush against my arm and I turned to face my bride.  Her eyes were full of tears, but they were not tears of joy.  I stared down to see a knife in her hand.  Her arm swung inward and I thrust my arm towards the blade.  Desperate to stop the act that her eyes had hidden so well.

     My heart had broken, in her eyes there were only two words written out for me to read.  "I'm sorry," my hand closed around the blade of the knife and..."

     I approached the man's bed quietly to remove the corpse.  No person had come to visit, but I could have sworn he had been talking aloud for the past several minutes.  Perhaps he was lonely, looking for anybody to tell his story to.

    I sighed as I pulled the sheet over his stiff face.  "Well old man," I said quietly.  "I guess your story was never meant to be told."

Author's Note

This was a sort of monologue turned short story. Hope you all like it!

Reviews

[Shelley Holt-Lowrey]

What a wonderful thing to read... LOVED the ending... Oh! The beginning and middle too... but that ending! WOW! Thank you. Favorite line:   She was my everything, she was my only thing. Says everything he felt in those nine words. Beautiful piece.

[ewest1220]

Wow thank you so much! I'm really thrilled you enjoyed this thank you so much again for reading!

[Shelley Holt-Lowrey]

I have read some of your things before. I really enjoy reading short stories. Poetry is just not my baliwick - half the time it's over my head. Your stories are a change for this place, and you write well - so cool x2! Glad you are here. Sorry it has taken me a while to get round to my RR's. :)

[ewest1220]

I understand the poetry thing it's not exactly the most popular form of writing out there. And thank you so much, don't mention it on the read requests I understand completely. I'm just glad you enjoyed my work :) thanks again for reading!

[F.P. Chat]

That was really great and sad, heartbreaking...Very beautiful.

[ewest1220]

Thanks!

[Lee]

"I guess your story was never meant to be told."

What a powerful line this is.
It's harsh and real and a truth in which we all fear to be true or applicable for our life and for our story.

A nicely written piece, has good flow and that thought provoking quality I personally enjoy. Yes, my first of many E. West reads. :)

[ewest1220]

Wow! I'm really thrilled you enjoyed my work and I'm glad that you would like to read more of it! Thank you so much for taking your time to read my work!

[Lee]

Yep, no problem. keep doing what you're doing... you have an interesting way of telling a story.

[Mariah Corey]

It was perfect i could picture everything perfectly i felt what u were saying. That was amazing, when you describe the old man as a corpse i thought that fit perfectly. You have an amazing gift, omg.

[ewest1220]

Thanks! I'm really glad you liked it!

[Mariah Corey]

np, :D

[Tattered Teddy]

WOW gads you really pulled me along with this story, and I was relating well to the feelings of being a child, teenager, man, and then old man. The love and the beauty of the wedding ... the unexpected twist at the end. Wonderful.

[ewest1220]

Wow I'm really thrilled you enjoyed my piece! Thank you so much for reading!

[T. Logan]

Like I say, everybody dies. This was really emotional, and makes me feel kind of sorry for the man. A good story!

[ewest1220]

Thanks! Glad you liked it!

[Stacey Watts]

What a very intriguing story here. I liked it. We all are born to end up dying. It is rather sad in a way. I guess it is true you should always make life count when you are here. Excellent work.

[ewest1220]

Thanks! I'm thrilled you liked my work!

[Sarah Hitchcock]

Nicely written, a pleasure to stop by and read, however I did spot two places, that in my opinion had missing words. Of course this is just my thoughts and you can dismiss them as you see fit. Two places are below....

Before I was even able to form (a) thought - for me it needs the a here....
eyes hide (the) truth even - again a the here....

Sarah.

[ewest1220]

Hmm. I'll take a look and see if it's something I want to change. Thanks for reading and I'm glad you liked it!

[Sarah Hitchcock]

You are more than welcome, as I said these suggestions are just that, the piece is yours to do with as you please. I am just glad you were not offended by my suggestions.

[ewest1220]

Never will be. I love input!

[Sarah Hitchcock]

Phew...thank you.

[Melody]

I don't know what to say, but I think I see it as a monologue better and not a story but I sort of see it come together as a story with that last little paragraph "I sighed as I pulled the sheet over his stiff face..."

[ewest1220]

It way tough to just end with him dying so I made a story out of it XP Though I am really thrilled you liked it thank you so much again for reading Melody! It's always a pleasure!

[Melody]

Yeah that makes sense. Lol. And anytime! :)

[Coyote Poetry]

Last thoughts before death will come is seeking forgiveness and having love around you. I believe like in the story. You would seek a good time in a life. Even with a sad ending. I like the way you told the story. A very good ending to a outstanding story.
Coyote

[ewest1220]

Thanks! It's always a pleasure Coyote thank you for reading!

[Rhea752]

it's heartbreaking. i love that her eyes hid her thoughts so well. i was just wondering what was going to happen and then Bam!! she killed herself. sadness. great job. Keep writing!!!

[ewest1220]

Will do ;) thank you so much for the review it's always a pleasure to hear from ya! Thanks for reading!

[Rhea752]

thanks for writin ;)