I Know Not Why The Caged Bird Screams

I Know Not Why The Caged Bird Screams

By: Ethan West

She lies inside her cage and screams

A song of sorts by end of means

Locked up for words which she had none

Locked up for nothing she had done

Innocent eyes and painted face

I saw when I upon this place

And then and then I cannot see

Why she lay there quietly

I tried and tried but could not budge

The padlocked birdcage door

I cried and cried and did not judge

She lay there now forevermore

Her beauty in this night so pure

A light of white like crystal mirror

I tried and tried to save her fate

I tried and tried to give her faith

I left that barren door unmanned

But the keys were hiding in her hand...

Author's Note

I wrote this for someone very dear to me who's going through a hard time. Please give me any feedback you can I really really appreciate it.

Reviews

[Alyssa Carlstrom]

This totally describes my life and the way it used to be, so you touched my heart. But that's my past.
I love how you said "But the keys were hiding in her hand...", it spoke truth. The keys were always in my hand, I just had to decide to let myself out. Keep up the good work! This poem is absolutely beautiful.

[ewest1220]

Thank you so much! I'm really glad that my work meant something for you and I'm thrilled you enjoyed it! Thanks for reading!

[Justin Flume]

Don't know what to say man.
Sorta speechless.
But good write!

[ewest1220]

Speechless is usually good lol I'm glad you liked it. Thanks for reading!

[R J Askew]

Cracking last line. It is like the last line of a perfect sonnet. I love to see proper poems with form. Free is great too, but it takes commitment to get it right in form. I like the rhythm you get going here, too. I feels like a ballad in parts, esp verse 6, which has an 8 syllable line followed by a 6. That said content always trumps form and the yarn and moral of the poem makes a great read, esp that last line. Enjoyed this.

[ewest1220]

That's actually a very interesting analysis of my work now that you mention it that ballad feel is quite present in this piece. I'm thrilled that you liked it! Thank you so much for your opinion on my work!

[∂αʌ<..]

Reminds me of the story of a Geisha...locked up within the intricacies of her fate.
a heartful poem! ;)

[ewest1220]

Thanks! I'm really glad you liked it!

[demureminds]

Ok, I just love this. The the ending was so powerful and distressing, but I also liked how entire poem flowed together.

[ewest1220]

Thanks! I'm really glad you liked it!

[Madelyn Defray]

The title alone absorbed my attention. I really, really liked this poem. It was so well written. Your concept of flow is amazing- I also like how you subtly altered the rhyming scheme. Good job! You have distinct talent!

[ewest1220]

Wow thank you so much for the in-depth review. I'm thrilled you like my work!

[Madelyn Defray]

No problemo chicko

[Serenity Faith]

Absolutely beautiful, and very elegant...I love the way it still flowed and rhymed, even when you changed the rhythm. Very well executed. I believe this will cheer up your friend.

[ewest1220]

It did :) thanks I'm thrilled you liked it!

[Eagle Cruagh]

First "the keys were hiding in her hand".
That expression would indicate to me that
"she" held the keys to her freedom always, as
most of we birds do. .... in our mind we create
the world......Buddha.
Suggest the caged bird screams for relief from
her miserable life, but unfortunaely like many of
us she holds the secret to her happiness.
Sorry about the pontificating, but you did ask for
'feedback.
This is great writing.... I envy your ability.
Thank you,
----- John

[ewest1220]

Wow thank you! I'm really glad you enjoyed my work!

[Elaenor Aisling]

Truly lovely work. I enjoyed it very much.

[ewest1220]

Thank you! I'm glad you liked it!

[Amen_Poppies]

This is stunning. You have a very clear message and the ending really touched me. I had a close friend who committed suicide. I gave her all the support I could offer and still it was never enough...

[ewest1220]

It's a tough thing to do go through. But I am really glad you liked reading my work thank you!

[Coyote Poetry]

The poem is amazing. It is a sad poem. We desire to assist people and sometime it is impossible to break in. I like the use of the cage and the bird. Thank you for sharing the excellent poem.
Coyote

[ewest1220]

Wow I'm glad you liked it! Thanks for reading!