The Two Lovers

The Two Lovers

By: Ethan West

This is the ballad

When all is not well

When a line must be drawn

Between heaven and hell

It started with something

Something peaceful, and strange

The bright gates of gold

And heaven's great range

But where was my love

Who I'd left behind?

Was she still down below

In an earth so unkind?

I walked to the gate

My mind lost in thought

As the angel approached

I knew what I sought

That if heaven was mine

Then was heaven wrong?

I was nothing compared

To my love and her song

An angel then asked

"Do you wish to come in?

To forget all your worries

In forgiven sin?"

I then asked the angel

"Where is my love?"

He pointed his hand

With the grace of a dove

The clouds had now parted

I could see within

I saw her on fire

I saw her in sin

I then asked the angel

"Why is she here?

She is better than I

Is that not plainly clear?"

The angel then asked

"Then why are you here?

She's been judged to be damned

And the reason is clear."

I thought in cold silence

And angel then asked

"Would you like to come in?

Your sorrow wont last"

I opened my mouth

Than closed it again

The angel looked puzzled

By what he heard then

I asked him and pleaded

To trade with her place

I begged on my knees

For God's loving grace

And the angel then said

"Are you sure you want this?

To take on her sins

So she may have bliss?"

I paused, and then nodded

With a deep breath I fell

Without scream, without shout

To the bowels of hell

But when I had landed

In the fire, my fee

I looked to my side

At my love next to me

"Why are you here?

I yelled o'er the mass

Of souls of the damned

From present and past

Had I been fooled by an angel

My eyes brought to tear

Until then she told  me

"I would rather be here.

My heaven was hell

Without you by my side

Do you feel the same?

Or is it just I?"

I stared at her smile

As she stared in my eyes

And I shouted I love you

Over the screaming and cries

She smiled back at me

But tears filled her face

They were all tears of pain

In this terrible place

But then her eyes opened

And she opened mine

In a bed of white cloud

With no passing of time

And at the great gate

Of heaven we asked

"Are we then forgiven

For all of our past?"

And the lord came to us

And his smile was wide

He said come to me now

And be by my side

And while I never will know

What happened before

With her by my side

I could want nothing more

Author's Note

The one and only ballad I've ever written. Would love feedback on it if you guys have time.

Reviews

[Lizbeth]

Wow, this is just an amazing and beautiful pieace of poetry, so moving and with some powerful imagery.
It would be nice to know that if one lands in hell, there might be a chance to escape :)
Was relieved there was a happy end ... !
Thanks for sharing.
Lizbeth

[ewest1220]

Wow thanks! I'm really glad you enjoyed my work and thank you so much for reading!

[...]

Wow! This is gorgeous poetry :) Love conquers all...sooo sweet :)

[ewest1220]

Thanks! I'm glad you liked it!

[poeticpiers]

love can conquer anything.
A brave attempt that works succesfully

[ewest1220]

Thanks!

[Mz]

Breathless!
My attention doesn't last for long so the more larger pieces in length sometimes lose my glance. Yours however had me reading along, swept away by this graceful song.
Ahhh, what one would not give to have love so true.

[ewest1220]

Wow I'm so glad you liked it! Send me some of your works so I can read them too :)

[Vee Cole]

i like this a lot and the reason why is because it's just what im going through beautiful poem

[ewest1220]

I'm glad you were able to relate and I'm thrilled you liked it! Thank you!

[Mockingjay]

i actually teared up :) Beauty in hell and pain in heaven... wow

[ewest1220]

I'm really glad you like it! Thanks for reading!

[Androglossia]

There is more of the purely artistic element in this writing compared to your previous poems that I've read. The case is quite different with respect to its beautiful ending unlike your other poetry. If readers were moved by that, it was from pure sympathy.

What hit me the most is the thought that because he loved her; he fled from heaven to be with his lover in hell and amidst the ferocious fire, his heart melted away just by his lover's look even as the the flame licked they're very skin.

Your ballad is equally good and equally beautiful. There could be nothing more delightful than to enjoy the effect of an authentic work of art.

[ewest1220]

I'd said it before and I'll say it again. I love what you have to say about my works. That first part gives a fresh perspective to how people interpret my work. Thank you! I'm going to send you another request, something I think you'll like as well.

[BrynnaW.]

A tearful, happy, sad, wonderful ballad. The story was woven so beautifully into these words. It leaves me a little speechless. There was one thing that's incredibly small where you should be your. So small but thought I should tell you: Stanza 6, Line 2. This was wonderful. A great read, thank you. Great job and keep on writing!

[ewest1220]

Whoops! lol thank's for pointing that out, changing immediately!

[Kevin S.]

This was beautiful. It shows that the love you have for someone is so strong and that no matter what happens, you rather have them over nothing, no matter what they did. It was very well written!

[ewest1220]

Thanks! I'm glad you liked it!

[eighwoeifj]

I'm absolutely speechless. Such a touching story written so beautifully. Love really is powerful and I'm glad there was a happy ending. I love it. You are a very talented writer.

[ewest1220]

Thanks! I'm really glad you liked it.