scene from experimental crime thriller

            Hes flying down the road. Hes put a safe distance between him and the city now. The phone on the seat beside him hasnt rung for awhile. He flies past a cruiser. Its not long before the lights start flashing behind him.

            Sonofabitch he says. He pulls over and sucks in a lungful of air.

 

The red uniform approaches from behind.

            Christ.

The lights are so bright.

And what can I do for the state tonight?

He rolls the window down a little more.

Driving a little fast back there.

The air is cold and wet.

Am I being charged with something?

He looks him up and down.

Well thats up to you son.

He has both hands on the steering wheel.

Man with the gun calls the shots officer.

He stares forward at the moon in front of him.

You look like youve called some shots.

He grins.

I wont lie I got a license to carry but I keep my tools in the shed.

Its a full moon out.

You own this car?

Big bright yellow moon.

Yeah shes mine. Handsome devil on this plastic in my wallet should corroborate my story.

His hands are white.

I ran your plates son.

His face turns white like his hands.

You dont have to explain s**t to me Im quite familiar with how my state government works.

He keeps staring straight ahead.

And what about your federal government son?

He chuckles.

Oh I could talk your ear off but I think I need to see some ID first.

Now he looks him in the eye.

I thought I was calling the shots.

He doesnt blink.

You chose to wear a badge and when you wear that badge you choose to play by certain rules. If you want to abandon those rules thats fine but then the only rules left to play by are mine.

His hands are bone white.

Step out of the vehicle. Slow and steady if you know whats good for you.

His grin is long gone.

Go home and kiss your wife if you know what's good for you.

He can hear the sound of sirens coming from the city behind them.

She in the trunk aint she son.

The moon is burning.

I dont know what youre talking about.

Big bright yellow moon.

Its over son.

The fed opens his jacket.

            Its over when you go home and I keep driving.

The fed retrieves his pistol.

You know how easy it is for me to pull this trigger?

Something moves in the trunk.

Its just like tying my shoe.

His heart is really going now.

My father taught me how to tie my shoes when I was very young.

He steadies his breath and slows his heart.

He wasnt around very much, but when he was my father was always teaching me something.

His eyes are searching for a way out.

My father taught me never to leave a shoe untied in case it should cause me to fall. I ask you, do I look like a man that has ever fallen?

The feds got his cannon trained on his head.

Every man falls. The how and whens left up to the cards on the table.

The feds thumb slides up and pulls the hammer back.

Im afraid you mistake me for some kind of gambler. This is not a pair of dice Im holding.

The sirens are getting louder.

            Take that gun off me. Go home with two good legs. Final offer.

He can see the flashing lights in his mirrors now.

            Damn good poker face son but it dont mean

           His hand smashes through the window and grabs the pistol.

                                               s**t!    

The fed is stunned by the explosion of glass.

            Cards on the table.

He dances the gun around to face the fed.

            Murderers not in my job description.

He lowers the gun and fires into the red-suited kneecap.

            Ill leave you one good one.

He speeds off down the road. He disassembles the pistol quick and throws the pieces out the shattered window as the lights race after him. The phone on the seat beside him rings.

            Hows it going back there? he asks.

            Who was that outside? says the voice in the phone.

            Federal officer.

            What happened?

            He rolled the dice. Look you cant be moving around so much back there youre making too much noise.  The phone is silent for a moment.

            How much longer?

            If I can lose this tail we should be there by morning.            

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[David O Whalen (O Haol..]

Took me a bit to get used to who was speaking and when, but maybe your style just takes a little getting used to. Seems like a chapter with a lot of promise: You can feel a lot of stuff is going to go down. (or already has) The only complaint I have is the lack of apostrophes. An editor would send this right back to you unless you correct the grammar first. Contractions (you're,ain't, what's, won't, She's) for just a few.
I like the suspense, but not the grammar.