Disposible, until the sun goes down.

A Poem by Mackenzie

Concrete smacks the soles of your shoes as you stroll steadily along the sidewalk. you can see her watching through the window across the street, you feel nervous.

The sun is grazing your back and she can see the beads of sweat drip down your neck while you drift farther away.

You don’t really know why your running.

She’s a good girl, she’s got your back...

She’s beautiful.

but then sometimes, when you look into her eyes. You don’t see anything.

no... Fireworks.

no.... Future.

and you ask yourself. Why am i here?

Why am I with her?

The question is not what she lacks.

but what you refuse to see.

As the girl possesses many qualities that one would find appetizing, yet, you just see a pretty face, and what’s left?

You stop at the payphone while walking towards home. You can still see her, lingering in the top window of the old house, the house you spent so many nights, enthralled by her.

You call your friend. tell her what’s just happened.

I wonder what inspires people to date or marry.

I mean we’ve all felt the need, right? It’s tradition in every culture.

we’ve all looked at our parents and said, "I’ll never do it", or "they’re so unhappy"

and for what? to get divorced. To have regrets, to have children and grow old hating your life, while your kids hate you.

I dont know why I’m so anti-relationship right now. maybe because the one person i want to be in one with is hundreds of miles away, or maybe because I’ve been trying to figure out what love is about and I’m to scared to get to deep.

I’m bitter, I’m tired of being bitter. I just want someone to hold me until the sun goes down and make love to me until the sun comes up. Is that too much to ask?

Your friend invites you over to her house, and you go, nervously as you always do, but this time you don’t have to worry.

You have a few drinks, get to talking, and pretty soon that girl in the window with a tear in her eye is gone and your new again.

disposible.