An Ode To A River

Grant me your wisdom, O river lady.

I wish to be a flowing stream.

For nothing lives longer than things like she.

A dying brook has not been seen.

So how does one become like you,

A celestial nymph, creature of light?

Through darkness and gloom, a being of blue,

Subtly sparkling in the night?

“My dear man, give your wish more thought”,

The goddess whispered to me.

“Rivers are many things, but happy they are not.

We live endless cycles of tears, longing to be free.”

Author's Note

Reviews would be greatly appreciated :) Also, in case there's any confusion, cycle of tears refers to the water cycle.

Reviews

[Glen Weimann]

Yes I got the water cycle. My only tiny problem with it is that this is a natural process that brings life and health to all of us, one way or another. Isn't this a laudable achievement? Wouldn't a river with a heart and soul like your goddess see this as a job well done and satisfyingly worthwhile? So I like the whole thing. I like giving personality to the river and streams. But I just can't equate unhappiness with the water cycle.

Regards
Nigel

[Ethan]

Yes, in the broad sense, rivers and water are good things. Hence the line "Rivers are many things". She merely tells the man that if he thinks being a river will be fun and fulfill his desires, then he is wrong. Sort of like Atlas holding the sky up. It's necessary for the survival of the entire planet, even praise-worthy, but his punishment is completing the task forever. You're correct though, I don think I express myself as well as id like in this

[Hope]

This is quite different.
The way your thoughts work is amazing:)
And your choice of words is great!
A beautiful read Ethan:)

[Ethan]

That's sweet. Thank you :)

[Najam Us Saher]

I wish to be a flowing stream is a nice phrase...
I really like your thoughts. Loved the last lines and rhythm...

[Sofia]

Wonderfully penned! I liked it...you can even publish this poem... you've got great skills!! Keep writing

[Shasha]

This is wonderful! I just flowed! Nicely penned! Keep writing!

[rowan.taylorrr]

i love this, i take back what i said to you before because it makes you who you are as a writer and it makes your writing brilliant. "We live endless cycles of tears, longing to be free," i love that so much, it is so heartfelt and so raw and so genuine. you are definitely going places with how amazing your writing is.

[Ethan]

Aw thank you :))))

[Alexis]

This is a really beautiful poem, Ethan.

So, heartfelt.

[Ethan]

Thanks that means a lot :)

[emmajoy]

'We live endless cycles of tears, longing to be free.”

Real poetry!!! How beautiful your poem is, set as in language of old, fine, fine meter.. and a heart within the whole.

[Ethan]

Well thank you!

[Raven Moonchild]

Ethan,this is gorgeous!!! :D Fantastic job!!!!

[Ethan]

That's sweet, many thanks :)

[Maria]

This is so touching and just great! I truly could see the goddess in all her splendor talking to this man, seeking more in life. Excellent work!

[Ethan]

Thank you :)

[Maria]

You're Welcome Ethan, you certainly have great talent.