Emptying a Bowl of Memories

She remembers her children and the day their world ended.

She remembers their laughter. 
It was always so joyous and full of love. 
Their eyes sparkled as they chased each other, running circles around her, even though she tried to tell them many times to stop running around. 
She still remembers the feel of their soft cheeks and voices. 
No matter how big they had begun to get, she wouldn’t stop carrying them when they asked her to. 
She knew she had spoiled them….but they had been her children….she loved them….
They were a part of her….

‘Mama!’

They screamed for her, to protect them, to keep them save.

She couldn’t do it, but not because she didn’t try. 

It is centuries after it happened and she still has bruises and scars on her wrists and arms, from where the Gods grabbed her.

She does not remember the feel of the Gods’ hands on her or the words they tried to use to calm her down. 
 She only remembers THEIR faces, THEIR shrieks, THEIR sobs, and THEIR pain. 
 
She recalls Loki….his thrashing and howling, turn to sobbing and pleading, unable to shake his captors off. 

She hissed, bit, yanked, thrashed, slapped, and unleashed curses over curses on those that she had thought were kind. 
Nothing stopped them. Nothing softened their hearts. 

‘MAMA!’
‘IT HURTS!!’

She watched as her oldest son's skin stretched until it ripped under the growing muscles and fur. Gentle eyes suddenly glowed red, with only wrath and hunger in them.

He jumped on his brother, biting into his body, ripping his limbs apart. 
She watched as one son ate her other son…..she still remembers the blood on her Vali’s snout…the way his throat bulged every time he swallowed another part of his own brother. 

She never stopped fighting, never stopped screaming, even after her throat was dried and raw.

Even now, when she dares to speak, her throat hurts and her voice is barely audible. 

  Vali was set free, to roam the lands….and the remains of her other son…he…
He was used to chain his father. 

She watched as the remains took their shapes into chains….
She watched as Loki was chained up and a snake placed over him as punishment.  
He had lost all fight by then. There was no fire in his eyes anymore.

She does not remember when it was that she was let go by the others. 

All she remembers is walking forward and picking up a bowl that her little son had been playing with. 
She didn’t glance at the others, didn’t hear them. They did not exist, not anymore. 

She took her place by her husband’s side and held the bowl up, catching the dripping poison of the snake. 

They did not speak for a long while, for every time that Loki moved, the chains rattled…
and they both heard their sons’ screams in that sound. 

They still hurt and suffer, for nothing will take away their pain. 

Except now….she remembers their laughter instead.