And So It Begins

a poem written in the "Dasyure" form I created.

And so it begins

fear undermines my domain

watch the spotlight as it twists and spins

senses, a fight to regain

as streets become dark

 

Haunted by shadows

past demons have left their mark

my scarred flesh, pays tribute to the blows

nowhere left to run and hide

rage burns deep inside

 

And so it begins

shackles broken, free from pain

an evil heart I'm told never wins

time for you to wear the chain

and hide in the dark

 

Feel the sharp whip blows

against your skin, cold and stark

taste the sweetness of fear as it grows

bid farewell to your known pride

you'll spend life inside

 

 

 

Author's Note

Written in the "Dasyure" form I created. form notes are as follows.

Stanzas 1 & 3 (5 lines - syllable count 5,7,9,7,5 - rhyme pattern a,b,a,b,c )
Stanzas 2 & 4 (5 lines - syllable count 5,7,9,7,5 - rhyme pattern d,c,d,e,e )

Reviews

[kollaboratyve]

This poem has a solid construction. I enjoyed the sensory imput it gave as I read it. I'm impressed at the flow of the words, and the thought connection. Your writing is very polished, and I hope that your creativity can balance off your knowing how to structure the mechanics of poetry in future writings. You have some stong metaphors that set the tone of the poem . The imagery allows you to see the situation unfolds right before your eyes. This poem reminds me of Williams Yates poem "Death." Overall, this is a good work !