The Bright Side of Suicide

 

The Bright Side of Suicide

by Erin L George

Being suicidal isn't so bad.

I no longer worry about material possessions. Why the need? Instead, I create lists. Who will want my stripped socks - the kind that go right up to your knees? Whom should I leave the dirty dishes to? Ha! My third grade teacher, who always hated me. Maybe I'll have fried eggs - burnt - for dinner tonight. Good luck with the pan.

I make lists of others who have gone before, silently giving nods to Sylvia Plath " wondering how she managed to keep her head in that stove. Terry Kath played russian roulette. (I always bet on black). And then there was Virginia. I wonder, were the voices just too bad?

You don't need a job when you're suicidal. And being laid off, laid up, or just plain worried about getting laid are perfectly fine states of mine when there is no tommorrow. My boss was a prick who demanded loyalty but wound up firing me because it'd be easier on the numbers. I broke my foot climbing the maple tree, wondering if the rope was strong enough. And I haven't had sex in years.

Naw. Being suicidal isn't so bad.

Your priorities change when you know you'll never see another summer. So much for spring cleaning. Window dust and moldy ceilings add a certain rustic charm. Should I clean out the cubbards before I pick up another zanax perscription? Will three bottles be enough? What should I do with my old love letters? Tonight I'll build a bonfire.

I get to exact revenge, now that I am suicidal. I wasn't good enough? I wasn't strong enough? My heart wasn't in it? Don't worry about it, me, or the color of the roses you carry to my headstone. I will be just fine. But you? You will live with guilt for all time. (My mother was always good at guilt trips). The apple doesn't fall far from the tree, they say.

I don't sleep now that I have a plan. There will be plenty of time for sleep. And now, I am able to stay up with the crickets. I keep the man selling cookers and fast chops company late into the night. I look at his dead eyes " mirrors to my own, and wonder, doesn't he know? Hasn't he heard?

Being suidical isn't so bad.

Reviews

[Danny Anthony Schromen]

Well Erin, um that was um... whats the word??? Not sure what to say... umm it was... enlightening..??? nah thats not it... It was disturbing albiet funny??? hmm im leaning towards, worrisome..

In that story, i think we are pretty much caught up from not talkin the past 2 or so years. I still adore you and love thinking about you. Keep on writing because you have a GREAT TALENT!!!

[VFrausto]

This is a lighter spin on suicide. Its dark yet quirky. I enjoyed reading this it didn't make me feel bummed out even though its about suicide. If there were a bright side to suicide you surely have found it here in this story. Great Job!!