Belonging

Belonging

 

 

 

a little murmur

heart in transition

few beats short of a cry

 

i saw you yesterday

in the lake's reflection

the water's swirl

still could not extinguish

 

the flame

you became.

 

 

erin-cilberto

11/30/24

Reviews

[Red Brick Keshner]

Hey j; The contrast between minimalistic language and their profound emotions is quite an alluring crafting. The idea of sustaining and un-extinguishing of memories is something to cherish.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, Freds...appreciate your words.
j.

[Kelly Scheppers]

That last line got me. I swallowed hard, remembering precisely who it conjured into mind. The heart remembers, even if we choose to forget. But do we really?

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I don't think we do, thank you, Kelly,
j.

[Soren]

A wonderful poem that gives one thought. If it is a reflection that one sees in the lake, then it is of oneself, although possibly another could be close by. I love poems like this that are somewhat ambiguous and leave the reader thinking about the poem long afterwards

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I like where you took this...thank you, Soren,
j.

[GlendaK]

IF I HAD READ THE COMMENTS...

I would have known this was a lost love.

So sorry, J, for answering so nonchalant.

Please forgive ...G

[jacob erin-cilberto]

On the contrary, I liked your interpretation very much.
j.

[GlendaK]

I'm honored, J. Thank you.

[Linda alexander]

Memories they can be seen in water swirls but the heart makes it in to a flame and it is not within our control but to extinguish the flame also not practically possible so poet name it as ever living memories . Really liked it a lot

[jacob erin-cilberto]

THank you for your kind words, Linda,
j.

[Betty Hermelee]

sometimes reflections in the water remain in your mind's eye....and they just don't go away....a poignant piece ...sweet memories will last...poem flows beautifully, love it J.
Warmly,
B

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your kind words, Betty,
j.

[Betty Hermelee]

you are very welcome J.
Warmly, B

[Desert Knave]

A couple days back I saw someone walking and was sure it was an ex ... but, of course, wasn't. Yeah, some things are never quite extinguished. ~Jim

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Appreciate your words, Jim,
j.

[Coyote Poetry]

Yes Jacob. Our memories can make us remember. The good days lost.
"i saw you yesterday
in the lake's reflection
the water's swirl
still could not extinguish"
I do understand the above lines. Now, us who love to write. We release to paper and pen. Thank you my friend for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your kind review, Coyote,
j.

[John the Baptist]

Be careful with those transitions. A needy heart can see things that aren't really there.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Yes, that is true.
j.

[Ern M. Yoshimoto]

i really enjoyed this esoteric little piece. the words flow like a gentle stream, natural and pleasant. the lines express some deep pain that is never explained but it is well-voiced. talking about it doesn't always make one feel better. but penting up emotions never work. through writing, the persona is able to release something, even if it can not be extinguished.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

It has been so many years...more poems, but never less pain.
j.