the one left behind

the one left behind

the draft woke me

coming through the slightly open window

i was a number

becoming a soldier

becoming a statistic

becoming a name

On a memorial

but no one recognizes the name

my name

much like the unknown soldier

my plot is marked with a number

a statistic

a draft hurries through the graveyard

chills the young woman

placing a single rose against the tombstone

an onlooker queries her name

just before she disappears

a mirage in a black dress

with a number sewn into the hem

of what was once

her life

his life

their life.

erin-cilberto

1/5/24

Reviews

[Vol]

Erin!
I am glad she is not morning you...
Jeepers, man! I hated those drafty days! 4F, 2S, 1A... I was blessed in the first lottery with a 301. I think the called up to 185 and that year, my year of escape. Unlike so many, I got to grow hair, wear beads and bell bottoms, and smoke weed at home. Today, I hang my head at the suffering of so many of my people who had to fight with bullets a political war that was none of our business, and left us all a diminishing society...

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I was 28 in the first lottery...
had a 2S and then didn't...and was 1A for awhile but got lucky...
I loved those Bells...and kept my hair as well.
Thank you for your understanding review, Vol,
j.

[Vol]

Far out!.................

[retreating ghost]

Last two stanzas were chilling. I cannot begin to imagine how terrible of a feeling it must be to know that you lost someone to fulfil a purpose that was not yours to begin with and even worse is to be forgotten . My heart goes out to the families who suffered through it and soldiers who fought.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your kind review, ghost.
j.

[John the Baptist]

The current generation probably can't relate to this one as the baby boomers can. By pure dumb luck I got on the waiting list for a reserve unit while Viet Nam was a relatively small war and they weren't drafting 18 year olds for it. But for many, and those who loved them, as depicted in the poem, a draft number could alter a lifetime. The Viet Nam memorial only tells part of the story.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Yes, only part of the story...thank you, John.
j.

[Ted Kniffen]

We could call Vietnam the god-forsaken war ... but aren't they all ... maybe if God didn't pay attention there'd be no need for war.
This poem haunts in more ways than one ... and those of us who witnessed the mess Vietnam was ... whether as a participant or an observer will carry those memories all our days.

Good one j.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

carry them forever...thank you, Ted,
j.

[Stella Armour]

Those left behind suffer anonymity too.
Theirs is also silent .....

[jacob erin-cilberto]

and they have it worse than the ones physically lost.
j.

[Gee]

Imagine what the ghosts of all those that gave their lives, in so,so many wars, must think when they look at "the better, safer world" they fought and died for.
This piece gets you to thinking about the futility of war and man's reckless pursuit of the annihilation of the human race.
Hope you are well Jacob

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your kind words, Gee,
j.

[D. Mansfield]

A haunting piece of poetry, that left me open mouthed, feeling the pain.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, D.
j.

[Cherrie Palmer]

I knew better than to read this poem when I spied the title. But like the mouth it pulled me in. The weight of it hangs on me and your simple images are haunting.
Excellent piece of poetry.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your kind words, Cherrie,
j.

[June bug]

Your last two stanza's are full of solid imagery, WOW!!
I also could picture a smoky haze with this in those two stanza's.
This is wonderful.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your words, June bug,
j.

[Chris Shaw]

That mess of a war, where you waited to be called to do your duty, whether you believed in it or not. In the end they were all numbers. And some gave everything and were forgotten. All those lives, all those mourning sweethearts and what for?

The draft woke you. Yes, it could have broken you too. It could have been you and you are so very much aware of that.

And the war was why my family never emigrated from the UK. My Dad had a great job and future awaiting him, but my brother could have been drafted. No contest.

This poem raises such negative emotions. It’s a breaker of hearts for sure.

Chris

[jacob erin-cilberto]

The poetry is almost getting too personal for me...
I need to detach.
thank you for your words, Chris,
j.

[Chris Shaw]

Let your words flow as they come. Let the dam break.