a stone's throw away

a stone's throw away

 

 

 

diverted diamond

misdirection of feelings

a finger left unadorned

 

Love in white gold

lies in the ashtray

like a used up smoke

 

passion burned 

with intense intent

until it didn't

 

a diamond diversion

caused her distraction

forged love

stones cut in beautiful blaze

 

sever the amorous throat 

in 'twain

with blade so sharp

this diamond's sheath

is the crimson red

of her heart.

 

 

erin-cilberto

11/20/23

Reviews

[Ted Kniffen]

I have walked that landscape ... it is a lonely desolate place to travel through ... attempting to reach the other side with sanity intact.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, Ted,
j.

[Chris Shaw]

A stone’s throw away can feel like the other side of the planet when two are not completely singing from the same hymn sheet. Heart, soul and mind otherwise love is doomed. I felt some pain here J. Beautifully penned.

Chris

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your kind words, Chris.
j.

[andrew mitchell]

A stone throw away is still out of reach and that stone can break glass houses.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I don't throw stones at glass houses, andrew, I live in one myself.
thank you,
j.

[andrew mitchell]

I was using a glass house as a metaphor for a broken heart. Oh well I got this one wrong . A house with those extra large windows?

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I got your metaphor, you can never be wrong with poetry...and my house has all its windows busted out.
j.

[AYVID N]

I felt the pain in your words. I felt the passion evaporating and the pain setting in. Love bleeds so much. Till it goes bloodless and lifeless.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for feeling what I wrote,
j.

[W. Barrett Munn]

This poem could be the prequel to the song that begins, If you want to be happy for the rest of your life. I am pretty certain you know the rest, Jacob.

Winston

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Ah yes, Jimmy Soul...I do know the rest...
"and from my particular point of view get...."
read moreAh yes, Jimmy Soul...I do know the rest...
"and from my particular point of view get...."
Thank you for the smile, Winston.
j.

[Stu. T.H.]

I read this from the point of view of the jewel. It wasn't love and passion, heartaches and human feelings that were constantly the objects of our main attention, but rather the objects that lingered and were left behind. We're seeing evidence to suggest a tale of unfortunate has occurred but knows little of what did transpire. It's as if we were trying to peer into a person's heart and were shunned away by said person out of their inconvenience, we were denied the details thus making it unique and imaginative.
The poem is as a puff of smoke from a burned cigarette, who smoked it? And with whom? We'd never know, and the air of transient mystery arouses our mind to explore the tale of our individual desires and lead to individual interpretations. Wonderous.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for this kind and insightful review, Stu.
j.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I like that read from the point of view of the jewel.
I may use that idea for a sequel poem.

[Stu. T.H.]

Sure thing, I look forward to seeing that idea manifested as another wonderful work of yours~!

[Patricia Wedel]

A collector of love-worn hearts that give Jewels to compensate… friendship becomes a Broach of Diamond ♦️ endearments. gently, Pat

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your words, Pat,
j.

[Soren]

Sharp and pointed romance that does not end as it was planned. So well worded and written as usual.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your kind words, Soren.
j.

[costa siwale]

Picturing a ceremony that doesn't come to fruition.
Enjoyed, very much so.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, costa,
j.

[Starbaby]

Oh, such a sad lilt to this tale of a *love* ending poorly, or perhaps it never really existed at all. For love to abide, there need be a connection of the mind and spirit as well as the physical connection. Love without the combination of both elements is destined to die.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thanks for your insightful words, Starbaby.
j.