defying the gravity of theme

defying the gravity of theme

 

 

 

a tiny slant of rhyme

shades the sun of my words

as they shelter under

a giant oak binding

 

pages of bark indulgence

you knew me before 

when my pen was just an acorn

stretching toward the sky

like a baby bird that fell from its nest

 

now in my autumn

i rake my syllables

into a pile

and burn them with the same fire

that burned in my chest

when i was writing like hell

was removing itself from the stack

of empty pages 

at which i stared with the matches

poised

 

the blank or the filled

which pages would sacrifice themselves

for my art?

 

most of those baby birds never survived

but i still write

and imagine it really is art.

 

 

erin-cilberto

11/4/23

Reviews

[andrew mitchell]

Brilliant title And Poem. I sometimes think thoughts on writing is like a mirage. The lines are out there but always out of reach for the write at hand. The other thing to mention writing is very seasonal like the seasons, a spring flourish or a winter stall.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your kind review, andrew.
j.

[Starbaby]

Who amongst us has not had those words dance and play upon the brain yet refuse to spill out neatly across a page and make their way to the eyes of the reader? Sometimes they fall easy like the autumn leaves in a strong wind, other times they swirl and twist and get carried away by that same wind and never make land. I enjoyed this, as I have enjoyed your writings that make the cut all these long years.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, Starbaby...it is so good to have back among us.
j.

[Betty Hermelee]

Just because our thoughts never get penned to paper doesn’t mean we don’t have them…and I believe that poetry is and will always be a form of art……it species t really matter about the sacrifice because either way you have those thoughts tucked away…. Lovely J.
Warmly, B

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I appreciate your kind words, Betty,
j.

[Betty Hermelee]

You’re very welcome J
Warmly, B

[Dave]

How many lines are written that are never seen? The thoughts that are lost or forgotten along the way. To try to refresh the long-lost ink. There is so much here to make the artist think and resolve to make it all worth while.
Take care - Dave

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I think too many, Dave...and many poems still sit inside the heads of poets, and they may never see the light of day...very unfortunate.
thank you,
j.

[Dave]

You're more than welcome.
Take care - Dave

[Kim S.]

I loved that 3rd stanza so much, this is wonderful.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, basic writer,
j.

[Andrew John]

Absolutely is art, J. Nice one.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you so much, Andrew.
j.

[Lorry]

I love the line "when my pen was just an acorn" Jacob.
It doesn't just speak to writer me, but kid me too, who used to ponder why certain books were amazing and others just weren't for me.
All those thoughts of what makes a great tale and hear I am, still not much more than an acorn suffering from stunted growth syndrome and wondering how such a tiny thing never fails to give me an abundance of Syllables to constantly rake up and keep me so busy, that once again I think "ill write something tomorrow, when I've raked the leaves up again! 😊

[jacob erin-cilberto]

more raking, more writing, more syllables in a pile.
thank you, Lorry,
j.

[Stu. T.H.]

A lovely work of art with a powerful message and story behind that rings true to many writers. Extremas of the arts of writing are well demonstrated and rightfully represented in the work while heightening the raw emotions that drives the author to write. It makes both a good story and a reflection for most writers as well.
Both a good read and an educational one, as I humbly perceived.
Thank you for sharing your work with us!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your kind review, Stu,
j.

[Maximus]

Extremely well written and very well presented indeed, I loved going through this poem which carries deep effective message and suitable words selection.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your kind words, Maximus,
j.

[John the Baptist]

A tiny slant of rhyme, you say? I have never noticed that in your work. In your autumn period, are you thinking of changing your style somewhat? Well, you have to go with what works for you at any particular time. Flexibility is a virtue.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

No change, but I have had slants of that rhyme in certain pieces when it came naturally...
I do just go with whatever is there...no forcing anything...just wouldn't be right to do that to the muse.
j.