Ring

Ring

 

 

 

 

mean streets and

sucker punches

the gut of the word

a left hook to the page

of serenity,

 

a black-eye of reason's morals

a heart barely standing

the pain doubling over

wobbling, swinging at imaginary jaws

of amenity

 

in the corner, bleeding "I love you's"

cut me, let me go back to her

one more time

I won't go down again

this eternity

 

I need to go the distance

to prove to myself,

I can still feel her

even with my vision blurred

 

 

 

8/5/23

Reviews

[William Michael Reeves]

I hope the other guy, or page, looks worse. What a row of words. Love is a TKO.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, William.
j.

[Chris Shaw]

a left hook to the page of serenity

What an incredible line J. Some relationships sadly turn out like a boxing match.

I need to go the distance
to prove myself

Well some do just that. Maybe it is better to throw the towel in. Each to their own.

Chris

[jacob erin-cilberto]

and that towel can be quite bloody...Thank you, Chris,
j.

[willweb]

And it doesn't matter how many times that bells rings...it will never be over. There will always be a longing for that match again. Sad my friend. I know this feeling, I know how it can leave you lying on the canvas trying to stand again.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

What's the count now, will? Is it ten yet?
thanks,
j.

[DIVYA]

Such an impact delivered by your words here...He can't live with or without her...
Such a predicament. Some love feels violent, embodies a lot of pain and some people enjoy it.
But the anger eventually destroys most of it. I could relate to this beautiful poem so well.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I appreciate what you said here, Divya. Yes, it feels violent on the heart, sometimes.
thank you,
j.

[John the Baptist]

I would never have thought love and pugilism could mix, but here we are. The wounds of the heart are chronicled in boxing metaphors: "A left hook to the page/ of serenity." I would have loved to hear Howard Cosell recite this one.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

"Down goes Frazier, Down goes Frazier!"
He was one of a kind...
thanks, John,
j.

[Coyote Poetry]

We must know when to stay and when to run Jacob.
"I need to go the distance
to prove to myself,
I can still feel her
even with my vision blurred"
I did like the above lines. Sometimes my blurred vision got me in deep trouble. Thank you my friend for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your kind review, Coyote,
j.

[Lydia Shutter]

There are times we remember only the good times, but we would be better served to remember the pain and not go there again. Things will not be different the next time....two people who are like oil and water just need to avoid one another. Lydi**

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I think poets remember the pain to write about it...I wonder if we can ever totally purge it.
thank you, Lydi,
j.

[Vol]

Jacob,
Goodness, sakes! I am reminded of a girl I dated who was from a fifth generation ranch family. She was a perfect example of uneducated brilliance, so tough, so determined, a gorgeous flat earther, ruined by dumbass cowboys who did not know how sweet and tender a Prickly Pear cactus can be if handled with care. The depth of her hurt and anger was too much, and that is a great disappointment to me. I fell head over heels in her blurred vision.
Vol

[jacob erin-cilberto]

This is a wonderful review. Thank you for sharing your words, Vol,
j.

[RomeroNYC]

a good poem knocks you out. i'm down. good stuff.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thanks, Romero,
j.

[Patricia Wedel]

A Ring with stones forever set over the Fields where Lovers slept … knowing that Angels wept… softly, Pat

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for putting your words to this one, Pat.
Much appreciate YOU.
j.