Mother

Mother

 

 

Mother,

you were a sonnet

in strict meter,

some beautiful imagery mixed

with comfortable notions of rhyme

because that won't stray from the truth

 

maybe a little free verse child

might be rejected

and readers will sense

it was poorly raised

and should have been revised

 

to fit in

to the structure of what society expects

 

Oh, I visit your ashes in my mind

and they color my heart with gray spills

I still try to rhyme when I can to please you

 

I know it does....

but I am out of character

and finally start to wonder

 

what would Father think of this

would he appreciate me sowing my poetic oats

in controversy

would he say I have guts

or lack tact

to please Mother

 

my strange writing has no siblings

and I have to hide my pen

under the bed

a shadow in the night light.

 

 

erin-cilberto

7/11/23

Reviews

[redzone]

Jacob, you rebel you....

it was my mother who was more the free thinker, artistic type who introduced me to theater, museums, and art.... while my dad was more strict, raised in a patriotic, conservative family.... but ironically it was my dad who introduced me to poetry, reading my brother and I poetry as bedtime stories... but his poetry had to rhyme and have structure... Wadsworth was his favorite.... he actually wrote a few poems, ut thought my poetry wasn't poetry at all... lol...

for me, they both influenced me, in their own way... but I think it was giving me the freedom to experiment life that was key.... yes they tried to influence and made rules (which I always broke) but it was still under the umbrella of allowing me to find my own way so to speak.... in this I think I disappointed them quite often until later in life...

they are both gone (Mom in 2016 and Dad in 2017) but I think about them often...

Jacob, I love your poem, it allowed me to see them both once again, thank you for sharing

[jacob erin-cilberto]

close for me too....she in 2014 and he in 2017...
My dad always asked me what I was going to do with poetry and whether I could get a job in it.
thank you,
j.

[Marvin Thomas Cox-Flynn..]

Good to see that you have good memories of your mother ... Not so easy to say for me, but I did come to accept that she just did the best she could ...

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Really, mine did as well....best she could
we have to appreciate the effort and know they loved us.
thank you, Marve.
j.

[Stella Armour]

I am an only child too , and of course my mother wanted me to be perfect v( but only in her eyes to show off to other people) . Me as a person didn't really exist to be honest i was always not quiite as good as everyone else's daughter uintil the day she died .
Of course when you are a child you try to please ..... well Jacob i don't think my mother would know what a sonnet even was lol.
Dad was happy if mum was ... i don't know why i was there to be honest ...

[jacob erin-cilberto]

My dad was happy if my mom was as well...I actually have a sibling....she just didn't fit into the poem.
Thank you, Stella,
j.

[Betty Hermelee]

This so beautiful, I almost cried, not because it was necessarily a happy childhood, but the you portray it so tenderly, you were an only child.....it seems like your mom was stuck in her own world of truths and proper upbringing according to the book....whereas you were a child of energy, fee-spirited, thinking outside the box, like you do with your thinking now outside the box...freedom and free verse....years have probably passed and now you can look differently at your mom and still appreciate her rigidity....I like the way you brought your dad into this and what he would think of your character......excellent poetry!!!
Warmly, B

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I really appreciate your words, Betty...
j.

[Betty Hermelee]

My pleasure J
Warmly
B.

[Chris Shaw]

Dear J, your parents I feel sure would be hugely proud of their poet son and what he has achieved. I think of all those students who have benefited from your teachings and the influence you have had on them and their work. I love how you look on your mother as a precious sonnet. Sonnets are beautiful, but free verse shines too. This poem is simply lovely. Both of them smile on you each day.

Chris

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I would hope they have some good thoughts as to how I have turned out...but who knows, right?
thank you, Chris,
j.

[Fran Marie]

I dare say your mother and father are looking down
with pride upon their son with warm affection.liking
your free verse style ..my mother wrote poetry in rhyme
and she loved to do flower arrangements..we hold
our parents in dear memories of by gone days
a lovely poem dear poet

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Yes, we do hold them...I miss them dearly.
thank you, Fran,
j.

[Patricia Wedel]

dear Jacob… my Mother had Blue Hydrangeas.. the blending of colors with the Seasons… she raised Parakeets that taught me to Talk and walk the walk. I write Poetry about Birds… and my Mother painted many a Canvas of Birds. Our Mothers knew that .. “A stitch in Thyme saves Rhyme”.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

My mother was a painter as well. I have several of her paintings on my walls.
Along with those of artist friends...
I like how I am surrounded.
j.

[Patricia Wedel]

The Sound of Music… My favorite things… be well always, Pat