the eccentric

the eccentric

 

 

i'll wake up in the sunshine

when flowers are drowned in

pools of rain

the lifeguard is sleeping

 

if only the roses could have 

been saved

but they sin in crimson

and lay splayed

praying

through weeping petals

 

 

erin-cilberto

12/30/22

Reviews

[willweb]

The roses may have been crimson, but you can color me dumb...I really have missed the meaning here and really want to know.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

let it mean whatever you might see, will.
Sometimes we imagine we have roses, but don't.
read morelet it mean whatever you might see, will.
Sometimes we imagine we have roses, but don't.
j.

[John the Baptist]

If roses sin in crimson, do dahlias sin in black? Now that girl really was splayed.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yes, I think they do, John....
j.

[andrew mitchell]

Hope and optimism seeps through this poem. Maybe you don’t need a lifeguard when all is well and there’s nothing like a bit of rain on the garden.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, andrew, a bit of rain...no flood, just a bit.

[W. Barrett Munn]

Would a rose named lifeguard still drown? Ask Bill. He liked roses.

Winston

[JD Major]

To me, this piece speaks to the brightest and hopeful among us so often being squashed for their efforts. Thought-provoking, Good one.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I appreciate that, JD...

j.

[light and ashes]

It seems like the lifeguard is always sleeping doesn't it?
Well, it does to me.
This is so amazing, beautiful, and unique,
100.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Light...
j.

[light and ashes]

always jacob...

[Red Brick Keshner]

What a powerful movement of imagery and quite a tonal contrast to the title. A sumptuous feast of a poem! Happy New Year j!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Red Brick,
j.

[Chris Shaw]

Such beautiful imagery in so few lines and the meaning deeply felt.

if only the roses could
have been saved

I think many will understand this poem perfectly. Pay back can be so rewarding.

Chris

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Chris.
j.

[Linda Marie Van Tassell]

Simply put ... this is beautiful. It portrays such vivid imagery and is something that everyone can relate to. You are a wonder!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

speaking of Karma....we were reading and commenting on each other's poem at the very same time.
read morespeaking of Karma....we were reading and commenting on each other's poem at the very same time.
Thank you for your kind words.

[Linda Marie Van Tassell]

Night owls unite. :-)