another happy poem

.

another happy poem

allow me to decry 

any of the feelings you still had breathing

for me

as i poem you with cheap shots

varicose veined words decrepitly 

emaciated

but insinuating that you are 

treacherously secure in your domain

in a frame of mind, to send hearts

to the gallows

without slightest pause

thank you for leaving me

while i still had a nip of pride

because i drank it in one tip of the thimble

the one you used to measure your love for me.

erin-cilberto

5/15/22

Reviews

[John the Baptist]

If this is one of your happy ones, I'm going to have to avoid the next sad one, or make sure there are no sharp objects nearby when I read it.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

ha ha...thanks, John,
j.

[Desert Knave]

"one tip of the thimble ... the one you used to measure your love for me.." Wow. That is a very stark description and really gave me pause. Killer. ~Jim

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, Jim, appreciate your words,
j.

[andrew mitchell]

What’s worse than going out with someone who wears their heart on their sleeve? Offered love in a thimble cup. Must be concentrated! Love the sarcasm and the title “Another happy poem” is delightfully sarcastic, brilliant.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, andrew,
j.

[Patricia Wedel]

Wow… this reminds me of Parody… I love the Thimble to measure Love. gently, Pat

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Pat,
j.

[CD Campbell]

I love how bitterness and sarcasm can have a great cathartic effect. I have felt the same way as you have on this page and yet you said it such a poetic way that cuts away any bullshit. One tends to get flowery and then gets lost to the original intent.

I like how the third line stands by itself. It visually looks like a solitary, pointing, accusing finger. And if that line is a finger, then the last line is the hammer that drives the nail home. This a great poem in my opinion.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Yes, it is like that, isn't it? Whether true to situations or imagined...cathartic...
thank you, CD,
j.

[Chris Shaw]

Oh killer lines here J. The blade sharpened here before the thrust of words.

No doubt in the reader's mind here the impact this relationship had on you.

Sarcasm and disdain, yes especially in your final lines.

Love the thimble reference. Top poetry here in my humble opinion.

Chris

[jacob erin-cilberto]

well at least that experience merited some inspiration...even if negative.
thank you, Chris,
j.

[Chris Shaw]

Sadly negative things like breakups and death often produce the best poetry. Dunno why, but it happens J.