I am not an ex-Beatle

I am not an ex-Beatle

 

 

maybe

I am a maze 

of revision

an edited version 

of who I was

before I became

a poem to be analyzed

critiqued 

crumble

into pieces

words scattered on the floor

lying still like a dead drunk poet

who couldn't hold his lines

 

before he became

who I am 

edited

revised revised revised

finally,

 

worth reading.

 

erin-cilberto

2/9/22

Reviews

[Kim S.]

a poem to be analyzed
critiqued
crumble
into pieces
words scattered on the floor
lying still like a dead drunk poet
who couldn't hold his lines

Relatable words here, completely understand this part,
this is amazing, I enjoyed this, thank you for this write,
so understandable

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Beckie,
j.

[Coyote Poetry]

I understand the below lines.
"crumble
into pieces
words scattered on the floor
lying still like a dead drunk poet
who couldn't hold his lines"
Maybe the drunk poet writes the truth. Thank you, Jacob for sharing the amazing poetry and your thoughts.
Coyote

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Coyote,
j.

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome Jacob.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

"I've never been to England but I kind of like the Beatles." Three Dog Night
"Like George, Paul, John and Ringo" Backman Turner Overdrive

From there we go to revise, revise...simplify, simplify, semper fi, always faithful to the written word and writing from there, trying not to cheat ourselves or our readers. You are always worth reading. F.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Fabian,
j.

[Patricia]

This is definitely worth reading! I’m always amazed at your writing of metaphors and any reference to the Beatles is a big plus! No revisions needed here j.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your kind words, Patricia,
j.

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Oh, this is just amazing. I love the title, how it was written, the way it was all delivered. ‘Revised, revised, revised, finally worth reading.’ There’s just so much power in these lines and it makes for an amazing, relatable poem. ‘Before I became a poem to be analyzed.’ Poetry isn’t just a hobby, it can be really a lifestyle. You take everything you see and absorb from the world and pour it into words. Thank you so much for sharing this beautiful piece.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your very kind review, Vertigo,
j.

[M. J. Smith]

If we are poems, then I must surely at times be a rant! And who then was my composer? Only the stars know. But they say nothing. Well written, my friend.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I like that, yes....a Rant....
I don't know what kind I am.
thank you, M.J.
j.