Queen's Gambit

Queen's Gambit

 

 

transient roots

upscale neighborhoods

turn to woods

a poor man's shuffle

the dance turns to 

ragamuffin partners

love is little more than a hand jive

 

home by five

a winter candle

and one lamp

to save electricity

as the thermostat plays a tune

of sixty-four degrees

and falling

 

much like my mental state

when I see you smile

through the window of your castle

in suburbia's kingdom

remembering what a feudal effort

it was to keep you close. 

 

 

erin-cilberto

12/11/21

Reviews

[John the Baptist]

Has the sound of a clash of classes. The speaker (A poet, perchance?) lives in straitened circumstances, while the unattainable lady is ensconced in seemingly upper middle class (or higher) digs. Probably a Vassar girl. Win some, lose some. Really liked the play on "feudal."

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, John....I appreciate your kind review,
j.

[Vertigo Cat1111]

‘In suburbia’s kingdom’ I adored this line. The whole poem is beauty and strong in of itself but that is such an atmospheric and amazing line that really expands the world. Every line of this felt like a perfect winter poem, warming and left a burning impact. ‘The thermostat plays a tune’ is another brilliant line. It feels like a cozy old house full of memories in the rain. Thank you so much for sharing!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your very kind review, Colacat.
j.

[DeaconHitchbight]

Reminds me of at least one winter relationship. "feudal" brought a big smile...I'm likely to read this more than once.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your kind words, Deacon,
j.

[Lydia Shutter]

I am shivering reading this one, Jacob. So many people suffer in the cold of winter. No money for heat or warm clothing. No money for sufficient shelter and food. We have to have a little more compassion when we see the homeless. They do not choose to be in the situations they are in. Everyone has a story. The "Queen" in the castle ignores the homeless man. How sad. Lydi**

[jacob erin-cilberto]

the world needs more compassion in general...thank you, Lydi,
j.

[Patricia Wedel]

We can be close in Poetry… like a Candle burning in a Window to cheer a Stranger.
Or one candle to light a Room where Hearts ♥️ unfold to share the warmth of Kindred Souls. Be still and hear the Angel Harps.., My friend. Pat

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Pat,
j.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

I love this. It is like a old classy movie in wors

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Dale,
j.

[R.J Calzonetti (Siniste..]

Another great piece. You paint a picture here, you really do. I like your style, keep up the great work.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

appreciate your kind review, Sinister,
j.

[Betty Hermelee]

A castle is a home, especially in suburbia...a shack....a cardboard bed...transiency...those who can't afford, do their best to survive in this cruel world. They are the forlorn...who must scrounge for food, shiver in the winter and even go out and beg....overlooked my most, its is a tragic situation, one that our country can't seem to fix. You expressed this so well J.
Best, B

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yes, but we go to other countries to help their poor....we need take care of our own.
thank you, Betty,
j.

[Betty Hermelee]

Very true and that's what I really mean!!!