Double Beds and Free HBO

Double Beds and Free HBO

i left my heart on

for her

she stayed cheap

and only for two nights

checked out on me

early the third morning

the maid found innuendos

lies

and empty pizza boxes

in the clutter

i was charged for the damage

and my key card absconded

now the entry

is forever locked

and i am in the parking lot

watching warily

for cars

and sly smiles

that sluice into my vein

where i once left my heart on

for her.

erin-cilberto

7/4/2021

Reviews

[Betty Hermelee]

Very clever poem, take off on those cheap motels, and I remember well the commercial “ we’ll keep the light on for you”….and what really goes on at these kind of places… not sure if your heart was really broken….but you got the blame for the mess.and the metaphor: “you left your heart on for her”
Very clever too my dear J…. I’ve never stayed at a motel 6!
Best,
B.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

that was why they took my card number...damages to the room, damages to the heart...and I had to pay...
thank you for the smile, Betty,
j.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

The metaphorical madter in top form. Even though it is about heartbreak I couldn'y help buy laugh at this whimsical poem.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I am glad you got a laugh, Cowboy...I always have to have a touch of humor...otherwise, too too too heavy.
thank you,
j.

[Lorry]

And we wonder how all we hear now is static and heels that click click and keep on clicking as they walk past our room, filling us with the hope not yet dashed they've seen the error of their ways and come back for us... This is how the story starts, but we never give up on that next chapter, do we?
Hope she at least left your car keys and wallet Jacob.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

Tom Bodett would be so pleased. I'm sure you remember those Motel 6 commercials. Your grasp of metaphor is still second to none and I enjoy the way you toy with the innuendo. Those "sly smiles" are the best, aren't they...some of them can keep us grinning like a mule eating briars, all day long. Delightful verse, my friend, and an exceptional read. Cheers. F.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Can't put anything past you, Fabian. It was a take off on Tom's commercial....glad it sort of worked for the poem...I stayed at one of those...it was pretty stripped down, but clean,
thank you for your kind words.
j.