Show

Show

 

 

Oh, the words can look pretty

and stylish

and run together in bonified ballet

 

the iambic feet pointing

lifting

archaic rhymes bow to the band

 

the old drummer

drums to the beat

of those iambic feet

 

but if the meaning

is just another show

for a poet who dances 

 

in drab spotlight

simply motion

with routine thoughts

 

binding the spirit

into ennui

the audience just turns the page.

 

 

erin-cilberto

5/9/2021

Reviews

[Relic]

I've been here so long and have written so many flops in the last couple of years. I wind up taking them down because no one is interested and I know they'll collect dust. I can feel it within hours that it was wrong to post. I've run out of ideas and my titles aren't great. But yet, I'm still trying. If there was a formula I'd learn it. But with me, It's hit and miss.

Good poem, J.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Mostly hit, I would say, my friend.
j.

[Ralph Proenza (Docralph)]

Relic, If it comes from your heart & pen, then it's a success. Even the Post-A-Note was a failed experiment with glue, and look where it has gone! Keep on writing, my friend. -Ralph

[Relic]

Thanks very much. :)

[andrew mitchell]

Tim you have more hits than a musician with his songs.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

the best poets here are more likely to be the ones who think they are the worst.
Your poetry moves the heart.

[LCat80star]

This poem perfectly represents every poets goals which is to publish a work that (hopefully) everyone would read. I experienced this issue but I discovered that what is more important is if you are content with your writing. Very nice poem with an array of interesting techniques.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Yes, if we are comfortable in our own writing shoes...that is key.
thank you, Lavi,
j.

[Patricia Wedel]

dearest Jacob... even Shakespeare spoke of
iambic meter of Ballet... your mind never stops
expressing the delicacies of Art and the Beauty of
Ballet and Poetry. A "really really good Show" as
Ed Sullivan would say. tenderly, Pat

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thanks for the kind words and the smile...
we watched Ed every Sunday night...and those Waltzing Mice...ha ha
thanks, Pat,
j.

[Patricia Wedel]

Yes.... we go back a ways ...
remembering when Elvis Presley was on the Ed Sullivan Show.. Still feeling young and wiser. gently, Pat

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Gosh yes, I saw that when it was aired the first time and wondered where his other half was...
my godparents used to buy me all his singles when they came out....that was my Elvis...fifties and very early sixties...in my mind he will always be that age and have THAT voice.

[andrew mitchell]

I couldn’t help feel seeing a poet on stage reciting and the audience chairs were empty. Hopefully this site is going through a phase, I hope it keeps going, all my works 5230 of them are on here and I haven’t moved them to a folder yet.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I would definitely move them....Mine come from a folder to this place....have to be safe with our work.
thanks, andrew.
j.

[Gee]

Many a time I'm lost at the title :)
Seems as though this place is on the wane, or the quality at least. I don't pop in as often but when I do it's good to see the familiar faces, stalwarts, that make it worthwhile coming through the door.
Hope you are keeping wel! Jacob

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Doing okay, but somewhat worried about WC...it's losing its momentum.
j.

[Gee]

Those that rule the roost need to be a bit more heavy handed with those that only visit to irk, annoy, irritate and upset.
7 years ago when I first landed this place was chock full of writers whose work was the inspiration for me to improve the quality of words posted. Nowadays I doubt I would use all fingers counting those that I look forward to seeing, reading, you obviously being one of them Jacob. Seems to me that many a new writer lands here with no intention of bettering themselves which I find quite sad, as surely that is one of the main reasons for frequenting a site like this.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I am afraid you are correct, Gee.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

and I do appreciate your kind words on my work.
j.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Just like hey say dance why no one is looking or talk like no one is listening we poets must write like no one is reading.

The paper is a dance floor so let the pen dance.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

and often, no one is.
thank you, Cowboy.
j.

[mattavelli]

Hello, Jacob! :)
You're not a big fan of rhyme. Haha
I've read a lot of bizarre "poetry"; and as one who enjoys adding patterns to his writing, I object to you singling us out, haha, but I agree that ennui isn't the feeling I want from a reading.
All art is communication, but not all art speaks to us as the artist would have liked, and some artists are too pompous. Haha

[jacob erin-cilberto]

and there is some damn good rhyme and some damn bad free verse as well.
but we do hope our words will have some heart and some zing...
thank you, matt,
j.

[Ralph Proenza (Docralph..]

Well said, Jacob. You always paint a vivid picture to make your point, and it's spot on! I love it! Sadly, my work is often 'in sad spotlight' which is my why my secondary user name is "Verbosity".

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Hey, your work always has life, Ralph...but then we are our own worst critics.
thank you for your words.
j.

[Sami Khalil]

You are so right sir Jacob. Words have power, style, motion and dance and above all meaning that can life up the spirits or not, bind them together or not and and cause liveliness or boredom. You write with real meaning.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I appreciate you, Sami...you are always so supportive...yes, Emily D. said "words have the power to kill but also the power to heal"--
j.

[Sami Khalil]

Wow! A double_edged sword indeed. You are welcome.

[Coyote Poetry]

I loved the language used in the poetry.
"binding the spirit
into ennui
the audience just turns the page."
The above lines were my favorite. Thank you Jacob for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, Coyote,
j.