one less wish

one less wish

there was a trace of snow as

we all met at the seven-eleven

for fountain drinks

and a bit of convenient cheer

when an old sot

stumbled in 

short on money

but long on beer

we bought him a soda

and a peppermint candy cane

half a sandwich

and his disdain

out in the cold he went

sated but fated to feel

that frigid blade of steel

certain the new year would arrive

with him absent.

erin-cilberto

12/23/19

Reviews

[Samuel Dickens]

How sad it is to see those who've given up on trying to live a "normal" life. Perhaps the root cause is something deeper than alcohol/drug addiction, but in many cases, it probably isn't. When drunk or stoned, one doesn't tend to care about life's tedious problems. With just a few words, you tell a longer story. I read several of your poems before coming to one I thought I understood. (This one) The problem of not understanding is me, of course, and not you.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i really appreciate your kind review, Sam..
Yes, what is normal anymore?
j.

[VelvetPotato]

"Seven-eleven" and "convenient cheer" did make me smile, despite the gloomy and guilty feel of the piece.

I couldn't imagine what it would be like to be homeless in the wintertime. Last week I took care of a recently homeless patient who had to have all of his toes amputated due to severe frostbite. It is simply heartbreaking the struggles they endure and the apathy many americans have towards them.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

you are a kind hearted soul to do what you do.
thanks for that.
j.

[Blysful]

wow that last line hit hard. i started off thinking ‘okay this is a pretty standard poem’ but that ‘cold steel blade’ of the New Year starting without the homeless man is just tragically beautiful.
this world is so harsh and we’ve become so desensitised to it, and I think you’ve captured that wonderfully. Thank you for sharing!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Blysful.
j.

[AYVID N]

A very harsh and cruel world out there. There is no festivity for some. Just a struggle for existence, moment to moment.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

that is for sure, and it makes me cringe...
thank you for your kind words, DIVYA...
j.

[AYVID N]

You are welcome, my friend.

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

Oh this is great it really pulls at ones heartstrings

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Julie,
j.

[Attentive_Ambience]

Visceral, and all too real. I find myself humbled by the essence of life and its many facets. Truly a reflective piece.
-AA

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i am with on that...quite humbled...
thank you, AA...
j.

[Patricia Wedel]

Food for the Soul...
time to reflect... Amen

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yes, amen...thank you, Pat,
j.

[Dave Brown]

A sorry story much too common.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yes, it is...thank you, Dave,
j.

[kentuck14]

Indeed, there are many lonely people in the world. I would guess we are all fated to feel loneliness . . . even when surrounded by friends and family . . . and even lovers can't truly fill the gaps in our souls. The sad thing is many stop searching for meaning and give in to the world's offer of numbing solace. A poem here J that makes one ponder these things.
T

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your insightful words, T.
yes, the "numbing solace" indeed.
j.

[Chris Shaw]

Reminding us of the many who will not be enjoying the Christmas season. A compassionate write. 'that frigid blade of steel' waiting to take him. Superb description here. Christmas, a time to show good will and compassion to those less fortunate.

Excellently told.

Chris

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind, and understanding review, Chris.
j.