Very effective. Maybe a little overlong for what you're conveying, but that's the kind of criticism you offer when you can't find much to pick at.
Posted 5 Years Ago
5 Years Ago
thank you for your constructive review, Christoph...appreciate you taking the time to read and comme.. read morethank you for your constructive review, Christoph...appreciate you taking the time to read and comment.
j.
These words just flow Jacob. From first to last, these are words spoken so softly from the heart, with nothing else but two people sharing one last moment together, as it always was.
Who needs to shout when whispers just add to the intimacy of the moment?
For some reason, j. this strikes me as an older woman looking back after her husband has passed. The items named…candle...book...glasses are as he left them. She cannot bear cleaning up and putting those reminders away as that would spell finis to their love.
Actually a very good love story, no matter how you read it.
Posted 5 Years Ago
5 Years Ago
and i really like how you read it, Ted....
thank you for your words,
j.
The sadness is bookmarked by me on this one, Jacob. Sickness, old age...that's up to the reader to decide. And they'll decide according to their own experience. Leaving things a little vague in poetry is a skill I've yet to obtain.
Such an eerie feel to this one and yet strangely romantic at the same time. Did the book close because he died or did the book close because the relationship was over? I wonder. There is an intimate feel to the relationship between Emma and the man. So intriguing, Jacob. A little early for Halloween, but it leaves me feeling spooky.
Posted 5 Years Ago
5 Years Ago
thank you, Lydi...not sure where this came from...it was just all of a sudden, there.
j.
I love this poem Jacob... it seems softly sentimental and loving as it falls easily as I read it... there is both a sadness (that the "book" closes) and a feel of, the thrill you get from such a sharing relationship.... I put this one in my top ten poems from you Jacob...
This is a different style of writing from you Jacob. It is poignant to read. It's conclusion sad and a reminder that in partnerships, that is exactly what can happen. Full of beautiful imagery and the fallen book and crooked glasses heartbreaking for her. She was indeed his bookmark. Excellent poem.
This is a tasty narrative peice j. It was an old English day, and time had come to the grand event of death. What a beautiful ending, where new stories will be written in respect to the original tale. The scenery in the writing is thoroughly enjoyable. Thanks for sharing man.
Originally from Bronx, NY, I live in Carbondale, Illinois...teach English at a community college and have been writing and publishing poetry since 1970. I am here to read for inspiration from other po.. more..