as thyself....

as thyself....

 

 

 

splintered religion

and i am still picking at the wooden cross

embedded in my soul

 

my heart spent its prayers

on Friday fasts 

and too long Lent lasts

 

i loved as implored

by the words between the covers

but she was in a different book

 

and i, looking up to the wall,

watched him watch me

wondering if i were just hanging on to a blind faith

 

and that if my good eyes

really saw you,

the amen of my devotion would 

 

arrive prematurely

grieving at the foot of that cross.

 

 

 

 

erin-cilberto

3/10/19

Reviews

[Lydia Shutter]

This one really hit me..."she was in a different book".....not sure if that meant she did not believe or she was a different religion, but I have experienced the latter. The faith we are raised with does not totally disappear was we grow older. It sort of morphs to fit our own lives. We are not our parents. "The amen of my devotion"...super phrase! Lydi**

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Lydi
and yes, on not being our parents.
j.

[Chris Shaw]

"but she was in a different book". I believe this to be a struggle between indoctrinated religion and temptation. I don't think religion won in this case. I didn't see any kneeling for forgiveness at the foot of that cross.

Chris

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i like your take on this...it fits well and thank you for your visit and words,
j.

[kitty]

Divided loyalties - guilt/shame creeps. How can we redeem the soul?

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, kitty,
j.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

The mix of your Catholicism and love breached told in cold religious metaphors. The first stanza is simply sublime and one many can relate to in both the sense of despising the religion ground into them and the feelings of loss and confusion and anger at loss of love.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, John,
j.

[John the Baptist]

Interesting words and images here. The title calls forth the command of Jesus to love thy neighbor "as thyself," but the Impression that develops is of a different type of love. There appears to be some sort of religious crisis involved, as if the speaker has been devout in his faith, but the object of his attention has been diverted by one "in a different book." Verse four depicts the speaker looking up at a crucifix, with the unspoken comparison of his hanging on to his blind faith and the body hanging on the cross. The last two verses reveal the realization that if he gives in to his temptation he will regret it. On the other hand, I could have it all wrong.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

you were very much in that place i was when writing...but even so...there is no wrong or right...poetry belongs to the reader and is what the reader sees and feels.
thanks so much for this insightful review...
j.