Lingering Landslides

Lingering Landslides

 

 

 

frigid fingers touch the keys

with brittle resound

echo cold caves of lonely love

signature breezes, wind chilled imagination

 

you had found my candle

but snuffed it with angry breath

yet i still kissed your staunch frown

into slight smiling submission

 

then the avalanche of feelings

overwhelmed us both,

and our hearts were lost forever

upon that mountain of doubt.

 

 

 

erin-cilberto

1/29/19

Reviews

[Anaisa]

I love this imagery & the emotion

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Anaisa,
j.

[andrew mitchell]

A Stevie nicks or Fleetwood song landslide. It’s only a temporary coverup, nature’s way of sweeping things under the carpet. Nice writing Jacob.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yes, Fleetwood Mac..thank you for your words, andrew.
j.

[kentuck14]

I see a pattern here. The last number of your poems presented here seem to make up subtle vignettes of lost love. Are you working on a project!? If so . . . very interesting. Oh, that "mountain of doubt!"
There are more bones of lost love up there buried in the snow than anyone can count.
Tom

[jacob erin-cilberto]

no project, they just come out as they do..i am just a conduit really...i appreciate your reads and words on these pieces...thank you,
j.

[kentuck14]

it's my pleasure!

[barleygirl]

"Landslide" being an all-time favorite song I sang with my guitar hundreds of times, I was probably thinking these very melancholy thoughts about how love always seems to bury me. Initially it's the craving I want to bury me, but then it turns out to be the burying that suffocates me! Great symbols for the yearning futility of it all! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[jacob erin-cilberto]

would have loved to hear you sing it, my friend...great song, yes.
thank you for your kind review,
j.

[Einstein Noodle]

holy toledo jacob! desolate hurt ... hopeful perseverance .. wrenching just "..a slight smiling submission" ... and oh my goodness the avalanche comes down .. the conflicting emotion and satisfaction lands on "..that mountain...." gee wiz ;)...what a devastating poem my friend ... i am overrun by the emotion ... wow!
E.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, E.
j.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

So full of the brittleness of hopes dashed on the rocks of disappointment fueled by fear of trust and commitment. As always packed with descriptive terms that leave the reader in no doubt that emotion is on a knife edge.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, John,
j.

[Annette Pisano-Higley]

Stevie Nicks would love this j.! The fragile fractured ice, the inevitable slippage of human interaction and relationships feted and so beautifully penned. The first two lines of second verse are vulnerable, raw and tragic. Metaphor, alliteration, imagery, stunning. Memorable poem to say the least-, brilliant, the most and true.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Annette...
Landslide is one of my three favorite Fleetwood Mac songs...along with You make Lovin' Fun and Blue Letter...
thanks again,
j.

[redzone]

landslides are continuous on that mountain of doubt, whether the frozen snowy type or the rainy muddy kind and both bury you alive... I have learned to run very fast away from that mountain and have learned it is best to always buy those candles that do not go out went blown by angry winds...

another wonderfully written poem Jacob, think I will stay right here in my room where it is warm and no mountains in sight... ;0)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

like Brian Wilson..."in my room"
:)))
thanks, Curt,
j.

[Neville]

Damn good and then some... hot as magma and then in a blink, cold as perma frost... I know how that leaves ya feeling.. N

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Neville,
j.

[Neville]

pleasure sir

[Dave]

I liked this, sad but poignant.
It seems that love seldom goes as smoothly as we would wish. On a whim, at times, the burning flame of love and desire can so easily be snuffed out. Those that remain are left wondering what happened.

Take care - Dave

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Dave,
j.