Iscariot's Dream

Iscariot's Dream

 

 

 

billowy martyrs

the break up of cumulus lovers

a sky bleeding from veins of monotony

 

we were once thunder

but the sound diminishes

a leaf or two will bend their ear

 

but we die on a cross of discontent

distance is in the wood

the smiles are just nails that do us in

 

pin us to our dispassionate pain

and remind us of the long walk 

that gets us to our resting place

 

facing opposite horizons

we weep for what we were

and keep the memories

 

as a kiss of betrayal.

 

 

 

erin-cilberto

3/10/18

Reviews

[Pete Langley]

Yes, I think I get this, J my friend, though you`ve moved through several stages of the oblique to illustrate the burdens we all share for the unworthy mistakes we all make at some times in life. The timely references to Calvary make the allegory very real to me. Thanks for stimulating my mind`s synapses for half an hour, mate! P.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for taking the time to read and consider my work, Pete.
j.

[Lydia Shutter]

"we weep for what we were" and what might have been too. It is a long walk that gets us through life and sometimes that walk is on a muddy path....one that we should avoid, but can't. Because of the title of your poem and the fact we are in the season of Lent, though, I think this has other meanings that I am not quite grasping. Still, your words are always a pleasure to read, my friend. Lydi**

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Lydi.
j.

[User]

I always find myself relating to your work in one way or another. I almost seemed to read this piece as 5 individual poems each verse a new one - though all linked by betrayal or perhaps just discontent. Thanks for sharing such a beautiful write.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Dotty,
j.

[Stella Armour]

The greatest ever betrayal....and the nails inflicted because of it.

It is (was ) a long walk,we have to hope to bear our injustices with the same grace.

Lots to think on here Jacob... especially not to always trust those who would smile at us..

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Stella.
j.

[Kelli April]

I love this piece because I can take each part (verse? I lack knowledge in the fundamentals and definitions of poetry and poetry types, my sincerest apologies extended for that) and take it for what I, personally, want it to mean for me. It is beautiful, though, when you read it as a whole because the first and last verses tie the piece to infidelity.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i am glad you can relate in your own way..i think that is what can hope as poets...that is the achievement we strive for...
thank you, Kelli.
j.

[Kelli April]

Yes! And it is especially important to me that I refrain entirely from reading ANYONE’s comments because I don’t want my mind to be persuaded by any thoughts
Other than my own.

[Kelly Scheppers]

I'm always finding a piece of myself in your work, no matter how small, something I can readily relate to.

"we weep for what we were
and keep the memories..."

You always find a way to shine. Nothing prosaic here!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for relating in some way to my scribbles, Kelly.
j.

[Jennesis]

I just keep coming back to this. I’ve read it so many times tonight. Cumulous lovers...monotony, discontent. Reminds me of how we keep going back into the fray, knowing the outcome, getting sucked back in by that smile, the right word. Until the end of days because that is us. Always thought provoking and lovely Jacob.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Jenn.
j.