Craps

Craps

 

 

tumbling dice

boxed set of returns on love

playing against concrete walls of my mind

 

you win every time

and i go home broke

with my empty pockets missing you

 

you roll your smile at me

and i bet the house

then sit alone watching a blank screen

of a deserted city block

waiting for you to walk into the picture

 

in a digital daze

my HD heart has too much clarity

 

you use me for your purse

and personal gain

then you run between the buildings laughing

 

and i end up too many stories higher

than my expectations

which long ago

jumped from the top floor

of reason.

 

 

erin-cilberto

2/9/18

Reviews

[barleygirl]

I like this poem overall, but these lines really knock my socks off:
"you roll your smile at me
and i bet the house
then sit alone watching a blank screen
of a deserted city block
waiting for you to walk into the picture"
You always have an amazing depth of ideas to play with! Your imagination knows no bounds! *smile* Fondly, Margie

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Margie.
j.

[Jimmy Yetts]

Gads! You appear to be playing against a stacked deck. (Yeah, I know that's not a "craps" reference--but, what the hell!)
Jumping "from the top floor of reason" is an impressive line; at least, you made it to the top floor.
Top floor of poetry, too.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Jimmy,

j.

[steppenwolf]

Very interesting interplay of images and the last lines deliver a punch. Great work!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Leslie...

j.

[Lydia Shutter]

Expectations....they are the downfall of many. When one person in a relationship uses another without truly caring at all, well, the other person becomes a sort of puppet. A "now you see me, now you don't" relationship plays with emotions and is not healthy. Great metaphor again. Lydi**

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Lydi...
j.

[Annette Pisano-Higley]

I know I say “brilliant” too often, but when it comes to you dear j., no other word will do. So..Brilliant language, form, metaphor, wordplay, cadence, imagery...every line and verse original, adroit and cutting- edge...there is no Lucky 7 in this game of love- the house always takes all..”my expectations which long ago jumped from the top floor of reason”- precise, concise, shattering..perfect work!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Annette,
j.