pour me another poem, please

pour me another poem, please

 

 

she was just pieces of herself

lost nights

another bottle waiting for dawn

her guitar soaked with beer

and blank pages of her life

 

flames consumed what was left

she was just pieces of herself

and the blue tips

of those flames

 

the liquor cabinet

(almost empty)

would never give away her secrets

 

and the smoke filled residue

of her existence

was a few cursive poems

 

and a glamorous black and white photo

of her better days

 

before the puzzle began unraveling 

and our hearts laid her to rest.

 

 

 

erin-cilberto

10/15/17

Reviews

[Richard Knox]

A very tender poem, Jacob, that paints a sad picture. It makes me think of Janis Joplin, although she left behind much more than a few cursive poems. That’s a great line, by the way!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your very kind review, Richard. And yes, Janis left us so much and died so young...as did Hendrix and the rest of that 27 club.
j.

[lightsong]

Actually, I don't know how I remember the title and my review is not here?

Our poems are pieces of ourselves, they are our company when there was no one, our memories, our future, hope, sadness, joy... everything that's inside us. I didn't see that last line coming. It added a whole new touch to the poem, I feel how she lived a lonely tournament life, now for sure deserve to rest. a heart gripping poem Mr. J.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

ooooh, I like that...a lonely tournament life.
that could be the start or part of a new poem.
thank you, lightsong.
j.

[lightsong]

Ok please forgive THIS HEAD I meant "tormented" but also considering your poem, it can be tournament too, competing with herself, now pour another poem please Mr. J lol

[jacob erin-cilberto]

see I thought "tournament" fit perfectly...
it is one event I have never finished very high in.

[lightsong]

Yes it fits perfectly as I've already agreed with You :>

Do You mean no matter how many poems You don't feel total satisfaction?

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yeah that too...but relationships...that too.

[lightsong]

Oh! I definitely see a new poem is coming :>

[gram linski]

Live fast, die young Valhalla calls our name, some of the lines almost sing, the creative, addictive personality can be a dangerous thing, especially if you are watching the smoke filled residue of her existence slipping away, pour me another poem, and make it a large one, excellent,

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, gram,
j.

[Cassie]

auch...this is a painful ending, drugs, liquor, cigarettes all end up destroying people such a sad ending to a would be musician.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

she was a beautiful person inside and out...a best friend...still ache.
thank you, Cassie,read moreshe was a beautiful person inside and out...a best friend...still ache.
thank you, Cassie,
j.

[Cassie]

I am sorry my friend

[Island Hippy]

Aloha Jacob, this is wonderfully sad and made me think of Sylvia Plath for a moment. It reads beautifully and has a lingering warmth that pours with imagery, mood and a kind of dirtiness that is rich with experience & a brilliance fuelled by vice and ‘crazy’. Loved it, many mahalo! Izzy

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your insights and kind words, Izzy...
will be back eventually to read...and return the favor...just taking some time away...summer school is quite hectic..three classes, two colleges and just 8 weeks...
mahalo...
j.

[Island Hippy]

You’re very welcome. Enjoy the quiet j! x

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

I read this again still love it Jacob

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Julie...
j.

[Giulia King]

I love this piece! So beautifully written :)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kindness,Giullia...

will be back eventually---and will return the favor.
j.

[Rebecca Leigh]

This was beautifully somber.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Rebecca.
j.

[bluessadmood]

this was so great its like soft sad music to my ears..
poetry music and smoke mix so well to tell how
a whole life seen through one night..just perfect
lovely write

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words,
j.

[bluessadmood]

you are so welcome

[sette]

jacob it is one spectacular poem very deep and symbolical i should say

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, sette

j.