Powerful piece, though we are just like You, observers, but You dragged us into these sorrowful painful lonely moments very effectively that actually our senses and mind were aroused, and this to be written by a man makes it even more wonderful, there is a certain sensitivity through Your words, and a true spirit of a woman hide between them, a spirit carrying more than one character of a woman, if we grasp closely, that only an aware sense can write it, great poem, thank You*
Beautiful, Jacob. And thank you for penning this for all the Eves who had to go through undeserved painful struggles.
Posted 7 Years Ago
7 Years Ago
i absolutely despise the men who put women through this...and i know it works the opposite way too.... read morei absolutely despise the men who put women through this...and i know it works the opposite way too...just makes me so angry.
thank you for your kind words gabrielle...
j.
Pain and hopelessness and death so perfectly expressed. So many die before they leave. Well done.
Posted 7 Years Ago
7 Years Ago
thank you for your kind words, Mary.
j.
7 Years Ago
Our brains must be in synch, Jacob. I just posted SSDD which is about the day yo day life of an abus.. read moreOur brains must be in synch, Jacob. I just posted SSDD which is about the day yo day life of an abuse victim
I feel the pain and hopelessness of a woman suffering from domestic abuse articulated in your words j. Eclipse references and imagery are vivid and dramatic as love and life itself is eclipsed by violence. You give a voice to so many victims of this crime. Thank you for this amazing poem.
Tbough the poem is stunning in its entirety, here are the lines after my heart...
and when the fatal minutes pass
she will find her way home to
a permanent firmament
sink into the kinder canopy
than that firm fist that blistered her skin
with cumulus blows
nicely written j as always with polish, although the undertones suggested an eclipse i couldn't help feeling this was a mask for domestic violence but that's just me and you are the alfred hitchcock of verse with hidden twists and plots. lol.
Having watched a total eclipse in the Australian outback, the feeling of awe has to be experienced.
Life appears to stop for several minutes. Birds fall silent, shadows turn purple and lengthen and a chill envelopes. Almost a homonym for the Apocalypse .
Posted 7 Years Ago
7 Years Ago
i like your poetic reply, Norman...more comforting than my poem is...
j.
Originally from Bronx, NY, I live in Carbondale, Illinois...teach English at a community college and have been writing and publishing poetry since 1970. I am here to read for inspiration from other po.. more..