always marooned

always marooned


my sky is breaking
i am a tear sailing into your memory
the ripples of sadness
sounding

then reaching for a softer sun
to assuage the monotony
of constant waves
trying to capsize my heart---



erin-cilberto
3/31/17

Reviews

[Island Hippy]

Aloha Jacob though the storms always passes eventually a lot of emotion in your writing, sad but hopeful. Izzy

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Izzy....

j.

[Island Hippy]

You're welcome

[John Alexander McFadyen]

The opening line is a draw into this pithy piece full of emotion Jacob

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, John.
j.

[Arjun Singh]

Your choice of words couldn't have been better..!!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Arjun...

j.

[Paul Bell]

Always think to myself. Some women are just to good to ask out. Or i'll leave it for another time. Though time seems to decade so bloody quick. Someday.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i thought about a girl in high school...thought no way she would...but said "what the hell" asked her, and she actually said yes...what a shock.
thanks, Paul

[Paul Bell]

He who dares, wins.

[Relic]

There was a girl I had a crush on in high school. She was out of my league so we never dated. 10 years after graduating I still thought about her.

We have weird minds that often set anchor on someone and never move on. There's always a good supply of tears off shore.

Nice one that flows J.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yes, always a good supply...
thank you for your words, Tim.
j.

[redzone]

and the horror I think is that those waves never stop, they may ebb some, even get a bit calmer, but they are always there pounding and ripping and beating again a heart... and turning solid rock into small grains of sand... definitely marooning us in a harsh landscape..

lonely, yes and also bleak comes to mind as well...as usual you leave the reader emotionally drained considering your words, and desire for a softer sun Jacob... I'll bet you smile everytime you do this too... lol

redzone

redzone

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Curt...

j.

[Papaya]

sad and lonely but i love the breaking sky and emerging sun, feels like the worst of it has passed

good write, jacob

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Ana.
j.

[andrew mitchell]

superb writing j just like smooth jazz

[jacob erin-cilberto]

you are kind with your comment, andrew.
j.

[Kelly Scheppers]

My soul is immersed, drowning in a crazed delight of your words.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Kelly...you are so kind.
j.

[Paul]

Written beautifully, and full of emotion. Nicely penned. I very much enjoyed reading this piece. Thanks for sharing!

Paul

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Paul.
j.