funds for that last meal

 

funds for that last meal

 

 

like a certain severance pay

that torn loose leaf note

you left on the marred dining room table

found me still setting places for you and me

 

etiquette be damned

i wanted to put three knives by your plate

so you could just cut my heart out

relieving me of the pain of entree

 

the too salty walking out

you tended to too often do

without asking to be excused

your sullen demeanor

just rose and left,

 

i was still seasoning my emotions

trying to make tasty impressions

you were driving away,

and driving me mad

 

now your memory is in the freezer

a leftover i refuse to throw away

 

and i still set the table for two

in my mind,

the candlelight dinner

will never have a last flicker

 

i can't snuff the pain

and i still have lots of room

for dessert.

 

thank god, for spoons.

and napkins.

 

 

 

erin-cilberto

1/27/17

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

Honest and real place described in the poetry.
"now your memory is in the freezer
a leftover i refuse to throw away"
I do liked the above lines. I have a lot of memories stored away. Thank you Jacob for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for relating, Coyote...i appreciate you very much.
j.

[Coyote Poetry]

I did and you are welcome.

[Re-Pete]

very clever and creative. nice job with meal metaphor. great ending. got the woeful tale across very effectively. i sense a slight sarcasm regarding the breakup. there's always takeout. fully enjoyed.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Pete.
j.

[Alfred Kukitz]

Funny I just found a torn loose leaf note on my trip to France. This poem reminded me of Deb, my neighbor, who in some ways has a piece of memory in my freezer. I'm not thawing mine. I hope you do the same.

Regards,
Al

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i will never thaw mine...they will remain freshly frozen in there.
thanks Al
j.

[Kesha]

This piece is highly relatable to many, the pain of not wanting to let the other person go but at the same time hating the other person for the pain they have caused you to endure. Nicely done :)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review...

j.

[Kesha]

You're welcome

[Bala Gorthi]

"Now your memory is in the freezer
A leftover I refuse to throw away"
So beautiful and relatable! As always, a unique Jacob style excellence shines in this craft too. Thank you Sir, for sharing this write.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Bala.
j.

[Lyn Anderson]

Some volatile relationships are hard to pull away from -- like a really delicious plate of something we know will give us heartburn, but we choose to eat despite the after effects.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

really like your metaphorical response...thanks, KL.
j.

[Jimmy Yetts]

Poignant and clever; a cornucopia of on-point metaphors.

"Now your memory is in the freezer
a leftover I refuse to throw away."

Stunning!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Jimmy...

j.

[andrew mitchell]

I find my table replacements has been squashed by your splendid write and deservingly so Jacob. You craft your verses with ease my friend. Dark sarcasm is the meal for today maybe regrets for dessert!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, andrew...

but no squashing...two totally different poems...and your poem is quite good.



j.

[andrew mitchell]

yours is splendid j as always to admire!

[Alessander]

this is like a dark comedy (darmedy?)
It's very domestic, and to me more nightmarish then any horror flick because it is so mundane and unassuming.

You do a great job of sticking to the kitchen.

The one suggestion I would have is to cut the last two lines. Dunno.

Just seems a bit too neat.

Ending it on "for dessert" i think hits both the sweet and sour note (now you got me doing it lol)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

appreciate your words, and suggestions...

will consider that.

j.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

it's intended as an afterthought---but maybe is too much...will consider it.

[Alessander]

Yes, I think you teach creative writing, and one of the things I found out is that poets are very tempted to "book end" their poems. I was guilty of this too (and often the last lines can also act as titles if you're out of titles lol)

It's something I'm conscious of it my own work. It's like the "da da" at end of a lot songs.

But that's not always the case obviously. Varies from dish to dish, so to speak :)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yes, and i am always a firm believer in less is more...this is one of those exceptions..tongue in cheek so to speak...:))))

[AYVID N]

and i still set the table for two
in my mind,
the candlelight dinner
will never have a last flicker"

Speaks to me of hope and lasting recollections of an uncaring love. It makes us happy to keep the memories albeit in the freezer. And hope.

A great poem Jacob.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, DIVYA,

j.

[AYVID N]

You are most welcome Jacob.