the wisdom comes after

the wisdom comes after 

 

 

flimsy reasons

trembling wit,

nothing funny to say

her smile is a thing of the past

 

she woke up while his heart was sleeping elsewhere

and as she stepped from the nightmare

his closet monsters from childhood

came back to maul what little sense he had left

 

now he sleeps with all the lights on

owning nothing but his

               alone

 

 

 

and she can smile again.

 

 

erin-cilberto

12/01/16

Reviews

[barleygirl]

Whoa! This is a highly-original & surprisingly imaginative way to describe those first throes of separation (or WHATEVER inflicts the shock & pain). I'm not good at interpreting all your metaphors sometimes, but this one is on the edge of incomprehensible (it's "out there") while still being thoroughly recognizable for me!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, barleygirl...

j.

[Ted Kniffen]

Alone! The complete package ordered and delivered by a jackass. I remember those 'closet monsters'. They sometimes return in my sleep. Good write, j.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Ted...they aren't fun, are they?

j.

[Ted Kniffen]

No, not much j.

[Lydia Shutter]

"owning nothing but his alone" the emptiness of this line slapped my face. When a relationship ends, what does a person leave with other than him/herself? Not much. This one is powerful. Lydi**

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Lydi.

[Jimmy Yetts]

A classic tragedy--though, apparently, this unfortunate tale eventually becomes a comedy, for her.
Unstable heart, prey of closet monsters, lights-on anxiety, abandoned--no one to care
(Is mommy still around?)
The personal hell of an overgrown boy.
And nary a tear for the damned.
Stunning work, Jacob!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your very kind review, Jimmy...

j.

[Tony Jordan]

She had been his saviour whom he ran to to be mothered but not his lover.
Who will save him now that she's wised up?

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your insightful review, Tony.

j.

[Tony Jordan]

welcome j..

[Jon Roggie]

I like it. I could talk about the intertwining story line, but I simply like it.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Jon.

j.

[Gypsy Warrior Queen]

I love your poems....I wish this were true, but sometimes like me, you never completely smile again...

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Queenie.

j.

[Gaurav]

Really admire your writings J. I wish to paint the whole picture in such golden words when i grow mature. Thanks for sharing

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Gaurav,

j.

[Paul Bell]

I suppose it's like going into a new relationship. Everything looks rosy to begin with. But then the other side of a person comes out. Smart people get out fast. The latter get trapped in the headlights.
But we're all wise after the facts.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yes, after the facts...it's like experience is something you don't get till after you need it.

thank you, Paul.

[Einstein Noodle]

what an emotional picture you paint ... so easy to see the whole story (as i see it;) i remember something a Paster of mine said one time ..it stuck with me "Marry a missionary, not a mission field" made a lot of sense to me tho i confess not always taking such good advice .. i think this is one dyno-mite poem ..last two lines are just killers for me!
E.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, E.....appreciate your words from your Pastor...smart...

and i am not good at taking sound advice always either..

j.

[Einstein Noodle]

:) ................