the way it was is how it is now

the way it was is how it is now

 

 

chained thoughts

working in a field of the cotton mind

of the owner of a plantation

of particular rhetoric

sweating semantics onto a soil of senility

 

he forgets more than he writes

while drudging up a past

that owns him.

 

 

erin-cilberto

9/18/16

Reviews

[Lyn Anderson]

I love this one. Especially the last stanza. All the loves of the past, forgotten, yet, the parts that are not forgotten, rule us.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, KL...

j.

[m.s.early]

if i become trapped in my world, i am doomed. but if i learn to love something in yours, i've room to grow.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

good philosophy, my friend.

thank you,

j.

[Coyote Poetry]

I do understand this poem my friend.
"he forgets more than he writes
while drudging up a past
that owns him."
The above lines are true. The past, a blessing and heavy reminders of things lost and gone. Thank you Jacob for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Coyote,
j.

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome Jacob.

[barleygirl]

Here's a great example of how you do alliteration -- extensive, but without overdoing it: "sweating semantics onto a soil of senility." This line describes me: "he forgets more than he writes" as I desperately try to write every story in my head while my hands still work. And of course, "a past that owns him" is the ball & chain we are all trying to escape, huh? (((HUGS)))

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, barleygirl.

j.

[Zahra]

he forgets more than he writes
while drudging up a past
that owns him

memorable lines. amazingly written

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Zahra....

j.

[Carolynn]

Oh I so relate to your last verse - my memory is fading faster than the rest of me it seems and yes that darned past of ours that holds us in those chained thoughts... :)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for relating, Carolynn...as poets that is all we can ask for.

j.

[andrew mitchell]

How a story can be told so many times differently on the onset of senility. a clever write as always polished in thought Jacob.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, andrew.

j.

[...]

hey, but it's metaphorically prime rib seasoned just right and full of pro poet-ein :)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, lynn, too kind.

j

[Ruth]

Such a busy process I feel here, even when those thoughts are forgotten they come and go leaving an energy in the mind...you leave no stone unturned in your poetry :)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

and you are very kind to me with your reviews, Poppy.

j.

[redzone]

our past can either haunt us (own us as you say) or allow us to become freer, that is to do and be better or different than we were... neither is predetermined, but up to us and how we live our lives... the only good thing about senility is that we are no longer influenced by either...

I thought those last 4 lines to be really hard hitting Jacob, you get at the heart of what mostly happens and make us look at it deeply... part of what good poetry should do and be about...

redzone

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Curt.

j.