Do not Disturb

 

Do not Disturb

 

 

 

sensibility checked out of the motel
reason became a vacancy sign

and love left without paying its bill,
now the neon light flickers with rage

and old age,
a bunch of rooms with empty beds
no one sleeps together in harmony
anymore

they stand at attention
with threats as bedfellows
munching midnight snacks

staring at the closet door
listening for monsters
praying,

the cleaning service quit years ago
the manager threw up his arms in surrender
and moved to a new country

but the lights keep flickering
enticing hearts to stop for comfort
and empty the closets of old woes
and restlessness

put sheets of poetry on the beds
let minds roll over in peace,
and maybe pay for another night 

just to feel safe for a page or two.

 

 

erin-cilberto

7/7/16

Reviews

[Papaya]

We let people into our hearts that don't deserve to be there just for the sake of feeling needed and wanted if even for an hour, a day, or however long we can hold on to it. That's what I got from this. Or maybe I was listening to my own heart rolling its eyes saying, here we go again...

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for sharing your feelings as to how you relate to this poem--

j.

[Lyn Anderson]

An old neon sign seems a sad thing. Just as rickety motels and unattended love. We become weary travellers looking for a safe haven, and find no solace in the empty bed. A beautiful, sad, and memorable piece.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, KL...

j.

[Latifa]

but the lights keep flickering
enticing hearts to stop for comfort
and empty the closets of old woes
and restlessness

in love, it's a mythical belief that we think of it as magic that's suppose to keep itself alive whilke we're resting in comfort waitingfor it to flicker with no match to ignite it, we often forget that we are the ones that keep the light of it flickering .

[jacob erin-cilberto]

so true, Latifa...

thank you for your kind review.

j.

[Shannon]

Occasionally metaphors get lost on me, this one, however is both clever and easy to follow (I hope). Beguiling place turns into the heartbreak motel. So true.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, S....

j.

[Lydia Shutter]

Your words grabbed me and took me to that motel. I saw the flickering neon sign. I watched the clandestine affairs about to happen. Safe? Peace? They can be foreign words at times. Jacob, your writing never ceases to amaze me. Incredible. Lydi**

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, my friend.

j.

[Miss Sharon]

And yet another totally captivating piece of art from your gifted pen Jacob! I love this one. ~SP

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Sharon...

j.

[Bacchus]

this one had my mind traveling to the Bates motel...
a love/devotion gone wrong
and yet you have to read again- hoping that the suspense will let up

i love metaphors.. can't think much outside them... why not try a piece or two without them?
for fun.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

sometimes the metaphors don't happen...but they just come...seems it is the way my crazy mind works...
thank you,
Bacchus..

j

[Beccy]

Another metaphorical masterpiece Jacob.

Always, your thought processes fascinate me; and the message, though subtle, (and exquisitely worded,) is never shrouded to the point where it becomes a distraction.

You are a grand writer.

Beccy.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your very kind review, Beccy.

j.

[Alfred Kukitz]

I like the festive feel, cleaver theme and hopefulness spinning this poem into a yarn of beauty. Very nice write Jacob!

Regards,
Al

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Al.

j.

[Vatsal Rohilla (account..]

Your comparisons are always witty and make one contemplate profoundly about them. This poem captures the mind of the reader and pleases him through its style, excellence and awesomeness. Lovely piece. Keep writing.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Vatsal.

j.