small town hearts taken over by corporate

small town hearts taken over by corporate

 

 

i still find your memory

a palpable entity

a continuity in an interrupted

love life,

with so many checks and balances,

you are the constant savings account

with my interest swelling yet,

to a heart's capacity

 

i could borrow feelings against it

and you would co-sign

in my mind,

 

yet the reality is, you don't remember me at all

if i were to turn your head a bit, today

you would see me as new customer

with whom to share a 

"hope you are well, have a nice day, sir"

and then you would move on

 

just as you did back when

the bank of "us"

was still open to possibility.

 

 

erin-cilberto

6/17/16

Reviews

[Marianne Rose]

This says what I often feel about relationships-whether romantic or not- how can two people share such intimacy, know each other, and when they part, one can leave without a second thought while the other still holds the attachment in their heart? Mixing money/banks/profit in is a good choice- our culture seems to have leveled our relationships to profit and loss statements, yes, just the way a corporation sweeps in to rob a small town of its heart.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Marianne...
j.

[Alfred Kukitz]

It's to bad.......you both could have robbed the bank, ran to Brazil and lived happily ever after.

Another martini please!

Regards,
Al

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yes, we could have been Bonnie and Clyde...

here's your drink...

thanks, Al..
j.

[Lyn Anderson]

Ouch. I have to admit to being the person on either side of the desk at one time or another.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your visit and comment, KL.
j.

[Papaya]

Super duper!
Improperly adjudicated love that was so carelessly underwritten.
Very clever write. Love this one.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind support, Ana...

j.

[Lydia Shutter]

Another poignant write, Jacob. It's a shame that we all have that one person that stands out in our romantic memories....a person whom probably does not remember us at all. Relationships like that are doomed from the start and yet throughout a lifetime, we remember. The bank closes down and yet we bang on the door hoping it will open again some day. Loved the metaphor. Lydi**

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your insightful review, Lydi.

j.

[V]

Another memory of a love lost a long time ago. The comparisons read originally, as so often you find unique and entertaining terms for describing the condition of your mind and heart. Though I have to admit I don't like the bank/capitalistic images that much but that's only my personal taste based on experiences yet skillfully penned.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i appreciate your honesty, Vanessa.....because when you comment on really liking certain images or metaphors, i know you mean it...

and i don't think i particularly meant for those images to be liked...everything today is about money...and there is so much emotional indifference---it takes away from the whole "love" thing ---puts it in unattractive form.

j.

j.

[V]

Of course I mean it and I'll strive to be as candid as possible with people.

Absolutely agreed.

[V]

* I strive to be (without will)

[barleygirl]

You always choose interesting & surprising analogies, weaving them thru your poems, but this one might be one of the strongest I've read of yours in awhile. I'm impressed with all the "banking" terms you've used to express feelings with clarity. But the last two stanzas is where your message really gets intense with the detailed scenario showing us the regretful story of this transaction, meaningful & memorable to one, but nothing much to the other. I can feel the narrator feeling invisible & meaningless.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your very kind review, barleygirl...

j.

[Carolynn]

Fond memories of a long lost love obviously matured and required withdrawal or renewal - but which one did you choose?

[jacob erin-cilberto]

that's a good question...not sure of the answer myself...thank you for the read and comment, Carolynn.

j.