inner city sweetheart

 

inner city sweetheart

 

 

 

neon burns into her soul

gravity walks her body's streets

a bulb flickers out,

LOVE loses a letter

the L...

 

now she can't remember if it spelled "Love"

or "Over"

 

she stretches out on cold sheets

a bed that lost its magic

 

she dreams of breakfast

as she hears the subway stroll by

on titanium feet

 

eggs and heartbreak as

old eats her up

business is dying

 

tomorrow, youth will rent the room

she can no longer afford

 

and she will seek shelter into the barrel of a gun

then holster her aspirations

when the bullets pay her bill

 

she checks out of her future

taking a couple soaps, towels and shampoos

with her, 

 

as she exits her nightmare

and a Vacancy sign glows with soft sadness

just outside the window of her heart.

 

 

 

 

erin-cilberto

5/18/16

Reviews

[...]

I like how you wear the shoes of your muse. Pulling out the character of your artistry. Empathy in vivid, emotive, metaphoric, cinematography!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, lynn.

j.

[Tomás Ó C..]

Reminds me of the sad story of Chicago May - check out my profile for it, as she found her business wane to the younger girls, she had to work at the grittier ends of the market. Her bank robbery prime came in her prime though, and she was more an accomplice than an actual boss in the American Express job...

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for sharing, Tomas....appreciate your visit, as always.

j.

[Alfred Kukitz]

Jacob,

I think one of these days I have to read all of your
poetry posted here. You are simply amazing!

Regards,
Al

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Al, you are very kind...

j.

[Lyn Anderson]

I like how this piece plays on a literal and metaphorical level -- the depth of sadness -- how difficult life can be and how we are all seeking, many never to find that happiness and contentment we imagine will make us whole.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, KL.

j.

[Kirsty Woodward]

Beautiful piece, Jacob. As always. "and she will seek shelter into the barrel of a gun". This line puts a lump in my throat.
"a Vacancy sign glows with soft sadness
just outside the window of her heart"
We're all aching for that one thing; but a lot are afraid to show it.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Kirsty

j.

[Gray]

This is amazing writing. It captures the darkness and grittiness of a poor city girl trying to get by the only way she knows. I like the background scenes you've woven into the poem in order to bring out the realness of city living on the seedier side of the tracks.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your very kind review, Midnight...

j.

[Ruth]

You always, without fail, weave such metaphor that is stays in my mind for a long time Jacob...such a sense of detachment here and acceptance in hindered tones...a massively wrenching piece...

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your extremely kind review, Poppy,
j.

[James]

Inner city life, ageing, depression and lost love all in one. I really enjoyed it. The message is clear, no confusion, at least not for me. Hearing the subway screeching through on it's rails just screams loneliness.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, James.

j.

[Anima Akuffo]

City life can be doleful especially when you lack the mindset and the means. You have a way of transporting me into the world you describe in your writing. Very skillfully woven. 👍

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Anima...

j.

[Beccy]

Masterfully wrought as ever Jacob.

Sometimes, a poem can lose direction if the metaphor isn't carried throughout; never so with your writing.

Sad, but lovely.

Beccy.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Beccy.

j.