Illegal Alien

Illegal Alien

live mornings

from Dead Beat town, USA

in the black hills of the black hills of hell

where fires burn but initiative smolders

like unsung ashes,

a voice screaming under the sun

blunts the epitome's wonder

inert humans

watch the news on stale TV's

burnt toast sits on an unwashed plate

alarm's sounding reveille

wasted energy

as life's consistency is like a sponge cake

or foam in a couch that never gets a chance

to rise.

 

 

erin-cilberto

5/5/1o

Reviews

[Taylor]

I write only prose, seldom read poetry and therefore, am not fool enough to rush in and critique! However, I stopped by, first because you're rising to the top reviewer -- which I always check out -- and then because of the current political discourse/disgrace in the US, the title of this poem attracted me. I can only react: positively because you have encapsulated the essence of the limbo-land of undocumented workers and no doubt others who by destiny are trapped. Powerful, menial images that strip bare the hopelessness and listlessness of what unfortunately is the truth of many lives in this rich but selfish country of ours.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Taylor...

and oddly enough, wrote this 6 years ago...

appreciate your visit.

j.

[Ruth]

Or like a scratchcard...we have to scratch to see beneath the surface of the mundane...this has such a pace to it Jacob, really love it :)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you so much for your kind review, Poppy.

j.

[Nisreen]

If this poem is about how Trump is polluting the American air and life for everyone
That everyone in his books has become an illegal immigrant
Then Jacob you are a genius ..... and if not
You still remain a genius because it reads that way for me

The guy killed the US

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i really appreciate your words, Nisreen...i would have to have been a prophet if this was about Trump since i wrote it in 2010....maybe some kind of esp was working...:)))

[Nisreen]

It works very well
Lol ....

[...]

And so you serve me meat and potatoes for breakfast...I like to dip them in the yolk of an over-easy egg and wash it down with a robust cup of "wake up"...
It's always darkest before the down, but a strong brew if wafting the noses of rising hearts

[jacob erin-cilberto]

your response is better than the poem itself...

thank you, lynn....

i could use a cup of that 'wake up" :))))

[iand63]

Mundanity of prioritising in a world of triviality. It is only when we see this that we can begin to see other possibilities. Some times we have to hit bottom to know it's there.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

no doubt that is true, ian...thanks so much for your visit to some of my old junk...

j.

[highonwords]

the stark meaninglessness of life - the routine of emptiness - like people are all ready living dead - no sentiments - no feelings - just a clock's face ticking to a sad ending

best,
steph

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yeah, it's kind of like that...just time ticking away...in many ways...

j.