Decomposing a poem

Decomposing a poem

 

 

 

the finality of your curt goodbye

rattled the posture of my bones

i slipped out of my skin into 

calcium contrition

trying to detox my disbelief

 

but there is no mausoleum in which to store the memories

to make them less addicting

i am a grave digger with a shovel of remorse

wishing i had understood

how i buried your love so deeply into my heart

 

because i now stand confused

at the headstone of our connection

holding flowers that wilt

with inconsolable longing

as i anticipate my next fix

 

of tears.

 

 

 

erin-cilberto

8/3/15

Reviews

[...]

What would you write, I wonder, if not for bleed of metaphoric sorrow?

[jacob erin-cilberto]

good question, lynn,

thanks for your words,

j.

[Alfred Kukitz]

Sorry for your loss my dear friend but look what poetry you gained!

Regards,
Al

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Al...

j.

[Cassie]

This is quite sad. You mr Jacob inhale very good poetic words and please tell me where all this words come from This is very very good. I love you work.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your very kind review, Cassie...

j.

[Roxie M]

This has a boulder quality to it. Huge, immovable...

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Roxie.....

j.

[Gypsy Warrior Queen]

So,this is why I feel so old! I have loved too much too hard and lost it all too many times! Hope the love doctor has a cure! LOL

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for the smile, Queenie...

i am sure he or she has...

[Lydia Shutter]

Difficult to control with whom we fall in love and which feelings stay inside our very souls years after a relationship has died a natural death. The romantic longing in this is intense. Perhaps some people are in a vicious cycle of love, hurt, love, hurt.....because they need that next fix of tears. Pity parties are the stuff some thrive on. Very good metaphor once again. Lydi**

[jacob erin-cilberto]

you are right Lydi.....sometimes people just thrive on pain...

thank you for your words,

j.

[CA Anurag Sharma]

I missed many of your lovely writings Sir.. will be reading those poems soon as I like your writing style...this is really a superb piece... especially the middle para....

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Anurag.
j.

[....................]

it's an impossible task when the inspiration for those corpses lay buried in the DNA...this is such a clever write, Jacob and so vivid, that I could picture the poem hissing as chemicals were poured over them to break them down...i guess all we can really hope to do is to prepare for the next rash of tears...

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, FT.

j.

[W.k.kortas]

Some deaths are final, some deaths are cumulative. Just the right touch of wry and detachment of tone, all coming together in first-rate work.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, W.k.

j.

[Beccy]

'The Moving Finger writes; and, having writ,
Moves on: nor all thy Piety nor Wit
Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line,
Nor all thy Tears wash out a Word of it.'

We can perhaps change a line or two, but 'tis impossible to wholly decompose a poem. Beccy.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

such a cool poetic reply....thank you, Beccy.
j.