Imaginary Walls

A semi-improvisational poem written as an experiment, and also a therapeutic exercise.

I wanted to share madness

straight out of my ridiculous

mind...

a passageway into my semi-sanity

to eliminate the barriers of self-

conscious editing.

do you see my fearless grin?

do you hear the maniacal laughter

within the cochlear corridors of me?

It would be truly therapeutic

for me to tear down imaginary walls

of masonry that

I've tried to place before my speech!!

and yet you all seem to see in

these briefly written verses

fragments of the truth of 

me - glued together with English

lines.

a full plate of armor cannot hide

the wounds of thirty-two

years self-inflicted and placed

beneath a handsome

exterior.

fortunately, piece by piece,

I am stitching each slash

back together...knowing

that I am able

to survive

through the mere creation

and seeking the emotions

deep underneath

the shell...

from whence

this poetry

comes.

Author's Note

Photo credit: "Imaginary Walls" by Gary Baseman. (Note: The poem was written in about 3 minutes.)

Reviews

[AprilRN1210]

I love this.... I love the glimpses of madness that each writing gives us of the author. The therapeutic way it allows us to tear down walls yet piece together fragments of our soul. I love the gut-wrenching punches and powerful emotions evoked with such short, profoundly moving creations, or the intellectually stimulating pieces that leave you scratching your head in wonder. Great write sir:)

[Eric Pudalov]

Wow! Thank you April, I'm glad you can relate to this. The emotionally-moving and intellectually stimulating pieces are some of my favorites too (although I confess I enjoy the erotic writing as well). Even an erotic write can be emotionally and intellectually stimulating, however - I feel as though they tell stories.

[AprilRN1210]

I couldn't agree more! I admit I am more picky about erotic pieces.. I often find them lacking in the moving department.. I confess it is my favorite genre to write though:)

[Eric Pudalov]

LOL! Yeah, that's a bit more tricky to do (make an erotic piece "moving," that is) - maybe if it were both erotic and tragic, somehow. I remember reading an erotic poem by someone (e.e. cummings, no pun intended) - and it was both sexy and sad, because I think it incorporated the death of the person's lover.

[AprilRN1210]

I like raw passion mixed with intellect and touches of romanticism. I want it all or enough heat to steam up my screen:)

[Eric Pudalov]

Mmm...I know exactly what you mean! Perhaps I'll check out some more of your writings in that genre. I need a little inspiration. (Not that real life isn't enough!!)

[AprilRN1210]

I am biased, but I have two of my newest fav's (overdrive and cyber dreams) on here.. They are definitely "stimulating" :)

[Teeya]

Wow!! I think I've fallen in love!!! This is spectacular on so many levels and speaks personally to me on many more levels. I am so critical of myself and I've only recently come to actually like my latest pieces vs those written some time ago. It's hard to just let go and release all inhibitions when writing pieces of myself for others to see and even for myself to look back upon. So I reread, edit, cross out, reword, and everything else trying to create perfection when I can only perfect what's perfectly me, which is usually who I show myself to be in the first place...perfectly imperfect! You have certainly become a favorite of mine...your work speaks to me with ease and my ears will remain opened.

[Eric Pudalov]

Thank you again, Teeya!! I confess that I may have done a *tiny* bit of editing with this, but mostly, I just typed it out on here. Guess it was in the moment, what can I say? A few times, I've even improvised out loud onstage (which is a little more difficult). And I'm flattered that I've become one of your favorites. That makes me smile!

[Robert Tusitala O'Neill]

I must say that the title pulled me in and the poem did not disappoint!

I really enjoy how manner-of-fact your style is here, and that it has natural poetry while also having a surreal and ethereal intellectual plane to it. "The cochlear corridors of me" is such a great line!! I love the idea of imaginary walls! That concept is so ideal for a poem. While we all know what walls are and can see how them can be imaginary, but the irony is that walls are only there to stop us in an artificial way, so to imagine them is truly the epitome of ridiculous despite that we do this everyday!!

Poems, alas, cannot be any more than ersatz cobbled together scraps of experience of being human, but THAT is what we are...We have nothing more to share, so that is the true gold of emotion when you can really capture it! That is what makes good poetry. Only 32? Wow, well I have another four years of self-inflicted injury hobbling me. You will survive, I assure you. I can see you know where you are going! Keep peeking out of your shell and stay handsome!

[Eric Pudalov]

Aww, thanks for your awesome review, Robby!! Your reviews, like your poetry, are so full of insight and depth. And thanks for the compliments as well; I'm truly flattered. Believe it or not, I really did write this poem in about 3 minutes - I just opened the "post" window and typed it out.

[Robert Tusitala O'Neill]

Sometimes the poems written in the shortest time give the most raw and honest depictions of your true character as a poet and what is unique about you as a person! This is the best you have to offer the world, in my opinion. Ironically I feel that people are at their best when they are the most raw and uncensored and in a sense, flawed! It is like how a 78 record clicks and pops all over the place, but it actually contains more physical analogue data than a CD does, or an mp3! The more raw something is, the more it has to offer directly, especially about YOU!

Thank you for appreciating my depth. Sometimes I cannot hold back the intensity, it is just who I am! What I can say though, is that I can't pretend to be inspired. I can manufacture ideas, but they cannot be inspired unless I am. I am hoping to possibly have a new girlfriend soon! If so, I feel like she will help refresh my inspiration to write! She is very artistic.

By the way, I have felt slightly more inspired in the last few days: I wrote "The Letter I" and "Don't Miss Me" just last night in a few minutes! It is good to challenge yourself sometimes...Just because if you don't then you never who what is possible for you!

[Bowers]

you are incredibly talented, I admire your way with words, a beautiful piece, broken but slowly healing... thank you for this, a hope is here, I can heal and mend... great write!

[Eric Pudalov]

Thank you Bowers!! (Love the name, by the way. I think it reminds me of a literary character.) Writing is part of healing, I believe.

[Bowers]

haha, thanks! It was actually Nilsson, but it was changed when I was adopted ;) And yes, I also feel the same about writing! :D

[Eric Pudalov]

Ah, cool! Thanks for sharing that with me (your adoption). I know not everyone is comfortable talking about something like that! Is it something you've written about?

[Bowers]

hey, your welcome! I havent written about it much, but Ive started a few pieces, I wasnt sure how interesting it'd be for people to read.. ? :D

[Eric Pudalov]

Ah, I think it most likely depends how you write about it (at least that's my guess). Maybe if you tell it like a story?

[Bowers]

Mm... thats actually a good idea, I think I might take you up on that suggestion. Thank you!

[Eric Pudalov]

You're very welcome! I'd love to read that one.

[Faceless Poet]

Walls so thick
And the doors are too Bleak

Nothing is what it seems
Verses that screams
Silence, hidden in words
To dance the melodic cords
In darkness it concord

Emotions in Poetry
Masked in Metaphoric Cask
Blending to the world
Our pen is our sword

- Faceless Being

[Eric Pudalov]

Faceless Being, I love your comments. They are poems in and of themselves...honestly, you could publish that as a separate poem if you so desire. And it's a wonderful addition to what I've written here...I feel you understand it perfectly. Thank you for reading, and thanks for your beautiful work on the page.

[Faceless Poet]

I am glad you liked it, Someday i'll post it, for now it remains here in your page, your piece inspired this review, so it is a pleasure to shared what I see... you are very welcome, Eric, keep writing :)

[C. Jayne Johnson]

"The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt" - Sylvia Plath
This quote comes to mind when reading this piece.

I would say it is similar to my writing style and that bias could play a big part in how thoroughly I enjoyed it. I love the unorthodox construction. Well done!

[Eric Pudalov]

Thank you C.Jayne! I just started reading your poetry, but I do see a similarity in the short stanzas and short lines, if I'm not mistaken? So glad that you enjoyed it, and thanks for including the Sylvia Plath quote; she's a favorite poet of mine!!!! I will check out more of your work soon as well.

[Lyn Anderson]

This is an insightful piece whether you see it as a simple mental exercise or not.

[Eric Pudalov]

Thanks KL! I started to realize that after I wrote it down, and actually started reading it. Has that happened to you before? (You write something, and the meaning only comes to you after you read it?)

[Eric Pudalov]

And may I ask, what kind of insights did you read into this? (It may help to hear it from a fellow poet.)

[Lyn Anderson]

For me, it is about the cathartic process of writing, that may not make sense to others, but is crystal clear within the mind of the poet, as he/she pieces together bits and parts of real life mixed with imagination and vocabulary.

[Belle]

I think as poet who brings fragments or slices of life in to poetry, the aim is really to break the imaginary wall between us and our readers. The satisfaction is totally different when the reader finds his way to our intended meaning.

[Eric Pudalov]

Wow, thank you Belle! That's a fascinating point-of-view - perhaps I make too much effort to make my poetry cryptic at times. It's tough to strike that balance sometimes, do you know what I mean?

[Belle]

What you mean I think is not being cryptic. Poetry is poetry, in term of language, it has its own rules separated from the rules of our everyday language. We really need to make familiar terms into un-familar; make the literary piece highly figurative.

[Eric Pudalov]

Ah, so that's quite the opposite, then!

[Belle]

Not exactly the opposite. Being highly figurative does not mean you are creating a wall between you and your reader. Giving room for your reader comes in many different way. A way like conveying universal message(s).