Prologue - Beginning

I ran as fast as I could. The wind pulsing through my hair gave me a push to run farther. I looked over to my right to see my brother with a smile crossing cheek to cheek and he looked over and saw an even bigger smile on my face. We slowed down and stopped next to a giant gazing beyond us at the rising sun that casted orange and pink rays across the sky.

   “Mr. Giant! Hello!” Wayden yelled up towards the giant’s face. The giant waved, dropping leaves and pinecones as he did so. We continued to run into the thick forest, maybe towards something or maybe from something. Whatever the case, we were having fun.

   Wayden stopped suddenly and immediately lay on the ground. I ran back to where he was, wondering what he was doing, and lay down next to him. His hazel eyes glistened as they reflected the blue sky. “Look Sora! That cloud looks like a castle!” Wayden pointed to the sky, past the green leaves and branches, into the land of clouds.

   “Yeah… It does. Oh look! That one over there, it kind of looks like…” My sentence drifted off as I tried to grab the idea that was just out of reach.

   “Kind of like a bird,” Wayden suggested as he moved his arms behind his head. “A very odd looking bird. Maybe it’s a dragon gone wrong?” The cloud started transforming into some type of feathered dragon as I thought about Wayden’s suggestion but concluded that wasn’t it.

   “A dragon gone wrong? No way. Birds and dragons are-” I paused when I heard a faint calling from behind.

   “Mom’s calling you, Sora.”

   “Yeah, what time is it?”

   “Time for breakfast?”

   I got up to my feet and begrudgingly started walking back home.

   “Maybe we could… Maybe we could just not go back,” Wayden said hesitantly from behind me as he shuffled around fallen pine needles with his feet.

   “What?” I didn’t fully comprehend what he was saying.

   “Yeah, it could work. I mean, I’m 11. I can take care of myself and so can you!”

   “Wayden, I thought you weren’t gonna bring this up again.” I crossed my arms in response to his pleading eyes. “I’m only 9. And 11 isn’t as old as you make it out to be.”

   “But it could be like this all the time!” Wayden made large gestures with his arms, “We could take a bus somewhere out of this place and go wherever we want!”

   “We can already do that, Wayden.”

   “I mean for real. You’ve seen my plan, it’s foolproof.  I’m sick of it here, Sora. Mom isn’t-”

   “What? You don’t think it will be like that in other places? We’ll be caught before we even leave our block anyway.” I said before he could finish saying what I didn’t want to hear.

   “No, I don’t. I think there’s something better for us,” Wayden tried reasoning.

   “Even if we make it that far we’ll either die on the street or be sent back here,” I said bitterly.

   “You’re just like her,” Wayden whispered under his breath thinking I wouldn’t hear. He looked down at his feet and we stood in silence for a while until I heard my name called again.    

   “Come on, we gotta go home.”

   The walk back was an extremely unhappy time. The perfect sky suddenly seemed dark and stormy, hiding us from the sun. We were basically dragged home by our responsibilities. We climbed over the short fence that separated the forest from our pristine backyard. I looked up to where our bedrooms were on the second floor, the empty windows, the identical white curtains that lined each one, and how clean everything was compared to the houses around us. I pulled on the squeaky back screen door and it opened to the smell of soap, leftover food, and agitation. We walked through the kitchen quietly to avoid our mother’s confrontation.

   “Breakfast is on the table. What were you two doing out there?”  My mother spoke calmly as she guided a sponge across a dirty plate, but you could hear the evil behind the innocent tone. I let out an exaggerated sigh.

   “We were just playing,” Wayden responded casually. Mother’s eyes darted over to Wayden.

   “You know you and your sister aren’t supposed to play out there.”

   “But there’s nothing interesting to play with in here,” Wayden argued.

   “You have plenty of toys, Chester. Be ready in 15 minutes.” Wayden and I mumbled some sort of agreement and got ready for school.

   That night I pulled the covers up to my chin and stared up at the plain, white, boring ceiling and made it into a masterpiece of color. There were mainly big, swooping, swirls of blue, and then red made its way in and they swirled and danced together. The colors transformed to purple. I thought about what Wayden whispered earlier and tears started flooding my eyes. The beautiful colors on the ceiling dispersed. I rolled over on my side and looked at the digital clock that rested on my nightstand. 2:47am. Only… 3 hours and 43 minutes until my alarm would go off. Only 12 hours and 37 minutes until I could escape from this cold reality again.  

   I dreamed I was running from something, what I was running from was unclear, it was just a silhouette from what I could see. I ran into a dead end and it slowly approached me.  I woke up to my mom shaking me. I put my hands on her arms to keep her from shaking me and she stopped.

   “Where is he?” I heard her say as the sleep faded away from me.

   “Where is who?” I spoke quietly, groggily.

   “Chester. Where is he?” I sat up and gave her a blank stare. She sighed, annoyed at my lack of understanding. “Your brother, he’s gone.”

   At that I tossed the sheets off me and ran for Wayden’s room. His bed was made and his room was clean, the books that were always scattered everywhere were gone and so was Wayden. I opened up his dresser drawers and found nothing.

   He finally left.

   My mother made me go to school despite my brother being MIA. I rested my head on my chilly wooden desk and forced myself to stop worrying. I watched as Ms. Tyler wrote something on the chalkboard and turned to the class like she was expecting something. My ears picked out the sound of the ticking clock and suddenly I wasn’t in my classroom anymore. The girl sitting to my left wasn’t a girl anymore. Her silky blonde hair was now bright yellow yarn and her nose transformed into a beak. I saw Ms. Tyler’s walk turn into a spin and she danced gracefully. The tiles on the ceiling, which had exactly 529 holes per tile, turned into golden leaves the color of autumn. My uncomfortable chair was a throne and the inhabitants that surrounded me smiled and danced. The leaves swayed around in the air as they fell and the ground was cushiony dirt, perfect for dancing. Ms. Tyler held her hand out to me inviting me to dance. All was perfect and my worries drifted away like the leaves. I reached out my hand to meet hers and everything around me faded back to normal. My teacher was standing over me. I could tell that words were coming out of her mouth but I couldn’t quite make out what they were. Was her expression one of anger or concern?

   “Sarah… Sarah?” Her whispers came all at once.

   “Yes?”

   “Your mother is waiting for you in the principal's office,” my teacher’s voice was soft and sweet as usual. “I think she’s here concerning your brother.”

   I grabbed my bag and hurried out of the classroom.

   My mother stood there with her perfect smile, perfect blonde bun, and her hands perfectly placed over each other like she was some sort of royalty. She stood from her chair and walked out of the office gesturing with her head for me to follow.

   “Why are you here?” I waited for her to answer but her only response was silence. She opened the school’s front door and led me into the parking lot. “Where are we going? Did you find out anything about Wayden?” The questions flowed out of my mouth without control and my temper was rising. I clenched my hands into a fist and my jagged bitten fingernails pinched my skin. I knew that there’s no use in asking, she never answered, but I couldn’t help it. I thought about Wayden, I was worried but happy he got away. At that moment he was probably on some bus heading out of Montana. We made it across the parking lot and my mother unlocked the car and opened the door for me to climb in. The perfect smile faded from her face as usual. The anger in the atmosphere rose and her eyebrows furrowed.

   “You’re going to have to tell me where he is,” her hands were on the steering wheel and she looked straight ahead, her lips pinched into a line. I looked out my window at the evergreens, they swayed in the wind but almost never fell. I laced my fingers together and bit my upper lip, sealing my mouth closed. She was getting angrier as the silent seconds ticked by. If she could refuse to answer questions so could I. “Where is he, Sarah?” Her voice was calm as always but strained. She turned on the car and started driving out of the parking lot. I rolled down my window and stuck my hand out. The cold wind bit my fingers and sweet pine filled the car. Mother rolled up the window and locked it.

   She took me back to our house and pulled into the driveway but didn’t get out of the car. Police were swarming our house like bees, their guns would be stingers and their uniforms would be striped.

   “The police want some information from you. Where is he?” She awaited my response but found only silence. “Tell me where he is!” She screamed at me and hit the steering wheel. I covered my ears and closed my eyes as tight as they would shut. My mother made an exaggerated sigh and I peeked through my fingers to see her lay her head on the steering wheel. “Sarah. Please. What do you know?” Her voice was cracking like she might cry. She never cried, I assumed because she had no heart, this was all an act to get me to talk and it worked.

   “I don’t know where he is. He just left,” I looked down at my muddy sneakers and my words came out like a squeak.

   “Did you know he was leaving?” She was perfectly composed as she spoke this time, all signs of distress gone.

   “No,” I lied.

   “Yes, you did. He had a plan and you knew about it.”

   “I never knew his plan,” I lied again. I had his entire route.

   “Damn it, Sarah. Do you want me to tell the police you know? I am protecting you. Can’t you understand that? If you tell me, we’ll get Chester back and everything will go back to normal. You’ll get off without a scratch. Don’t you want Chester back?”

   “No, I don’t want normal.” I watched as she pounded her fist on the steering wheel again and got out of the car. I could hear what she said to the police from inside of the car and I forced myself to stop recognizing the words, it sounded like some angry alien or buzzing bee.  

After the police left I sat in my open window and tried to telepathically communicate with Wayden. I tried telling him that he should have taken me with him. I asked him when he would be back. I ranted about how unfair it is that he left without a word. The stars were assembling above me. My mind wandered off and I imagined a place where gravity only ever pulled south. People would only live on the top of the planet because they would have to hold on anywhere else. I imagined the planets constantly falling through a never ending space, still spinning almost chaotically. It was almost as if I got completely absorbed into this world. Streets and avenues started being drawn over the snowy town. I ran through the comforting cold of the streets, exploring the newly developed world. I danced to a song that was stuck in my head and suddenly it was broadcasted all around me. I ran over to a particularly nice spot that sat on a cliff and imagined a house there. It started constructing itself from the particles in the air and wove itself together to form something beyond what I was imagining. I left that house on its own and started building others. People started growing up from the ground like plants. After a while I realized they were all the same person. Wayden. I stood there in the soft snow as versions of my brother appeared all around me. I turned looking for a way to escape, but only found more of my brother. The snow solidified into ice and I saw my reflection. My lavender eyes teared up and the tears froze before even having the chance to hit the cold hard ground beneath me. One of the many versions of Wayden approached me and reached his hand out to me. I took it expecting warmth, but I couldn’t feel anything, like trying to hold on to air. I looked at the hand I was supposedly holding and it melted in my palm. I looked up to the rest of him and watched as the rest of him melted. I let the water drip through my fingertips. The rest of them looked perfectly in tact. I touched another and he dripped away. My vision blurred away and I lost all control of my body. I shut my eyes tight.

My shirt was wet with tears. I looked out of the window to see frost building on the grass. The clock screamed 2:21am with its neon green voice. I had blanked out for 4 hours. I stumbled out of the window and went over to my mirror. My brown eyes looked dull and almost glassy. Maybe I’m dying I thought to myself. I washed my face and the color slowly came back to my eyes. This was the first time this happened, little did I know that it would take over my life.

The years went on and, in fact, I was not dying. At first I thought my blanking out was some kind of mental disorder but as it started happening more, the more I started enjoying it. It was like my therapy. I started controlling it more and being able to use it to my advantage. For example, blanking out for the entirety of my history class. As for Wayden, I never heard from him. Not a letter, not a call, not a message, and not a trace left of who he was. I tried forgetting him countless times but to no avail. I started mapping out my world in my free time and once I started drawing my world, I started drawing other things too. Drawing is now my favorite hobby and when I don’t have an opportunity to blank out, I draw. I also took up ballet and made my childhood dream more of a reality. When I became more advanced in it, I started weaving it in with my drawing, imagining the lines my feet would make while I danced.

I really blamed my mother for Wayden leaving. I kind of transferred my anger for him  leaving me behind to being angry at her for causing him to. She pushed down on him so hard trying to break him that instead he slipped out of her grasp. Then, with no one else to oppress, she pushed down on me. She tries to make me more likable for her. Constantly giving commands, trying to make me more like other people. One day she pushed a big, red, dangerous button that I had tried long to hide. This is the story of what happened.

Author's Note

Reviews on grammar, anything that just doesn't feel quite right, or anything really is super helpful