IT WANTS ME OUT!

A scary little poem let me know if you guys think its scary haha, feedback would be much appreciated.

I see it in my dreams,

and when i close my eyes.

Though no one hears my screams,

Or my many cry's.

A shadow like figure black as night,

A hooded figure that doesn't like light.

If you look inside its hood its hollow there is nothing there,

Nothing but its red evil eyes into your soul they glare.

Its pure evil that i know for sure,

It feeds off fear and it only wants more.

I try to escape its gaze to look the other way,

Although i cant seem to move as i freeze and prey.

I prey for i know its not only in my dreams but in my house,

for sometimes things fall or break and i know i don't have a mouse.

Things happen that i cant seem to explain,

i don't know what it wants its messing with my brain.

Dreaming tonight i cant seem to wake so i ask it what it wants...........

It looks up grins and with its bony finger it points.....

A chill jolts down my spine as it points to my door,

Its only then i relize im not asleep anymore.

A demonic voice just as scary as they get i hear it say,

Get out of my house or ill make you pay.

Reviews

[Tony Jordan]

I think it's pretty scary Cimmy. Yes. You painted a ghoulish character well here.
The transition from dreams to real-life haunting was swift like a jump scene from a movie and the addition of the 'mouse' line brought a kind of gallows humour - a sort of hysteria to it, which I thought was really skilful.
Well done.
:)
one fly in the ointment 'prey' should be 'pray'

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Thankz so much hlad you enjoyed it :)
I appreciate your review

[L.M.Warde]

I enjoyed this a lot! I love all things creepy and you got the right mood. A nice read, gets the reader into it right at the start and holds em to the end, well done!

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

thanks so much means alot that you like my work.
Glad you enjoyed and that it keeps you reading thats what i was hoping for :)

[Lee Foreman]

Really creepy read.. :).. It really told a story.. I love creepy reads, so I definitely enjoyed this one!!

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Glad you enjoyed :)
Thanks for the review :)

[Lisa Victoria]

I'm a horror genre freak and I love this!! Well done....

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Haha im obsessed with everything horror :P
thanks so much glad you enjoyed :)

[Lisa Victoria]

Your welcome....I look forward to reading more of your writing:)

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

thanks i look forward to reading more of yours as well :)

[ron]

it is scary. And it has hapened to people before I think thats what makes it so scary it is true. Nicely done.

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

something similar happened to my sister thats where i got the idea of what it looked like. pretty freaky acctually.
i feel very sorry for anyone else who has really experienced anything like this.
im so glad you liked it thanks so much for your review ron

[SquinklaPsyOps]

I feel like I went on a journey and saw all those images!

Not to make light of this, but it almost also had the feeling of a riddle.

Great work, thank you for sharing your intelectual ability.

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

thanks hun thanks for the read and review glad you liked it :)

[SquinklaPsyOps]

Look at you, I didn't know you were such a great writer, definitely becoming a fan.

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

awwww thanks so much. I didnt know you liked my stuff so much :) means so much :)

[annabellee]

this is definetly scary, fantastic write, great descriptions, great flow, I loved it. I also liked the image.
Well done :)

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

so glad u liked it :) different to my other writes :) thanks again for the review :)

[annabellee]

you're most welcome :)

[NA]

Awesome scary read hun...really enjoyed :) x

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

glad you enjoyed it Raven :) thanks for reading and reviewing means allot :)

[The Invisible Girl]

Creepy but very well written! :) keep it up!

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

thanks :) im glad you liked it thanks so much for the review :)

[The Invisible Girl]

You're welcome! :)

[mark]

i love this one babe. its pretty creepy it will give people chills down their spine when they read it. it was very well written.
you took my idea for a poem u a*****e :P
u would have done a better job than me anyways lol :P
but u did well i really enjoyed reading this one sweetie :)
i love you :)

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

im glad u liked it hun :) i didnt think it was that good, fucked up allot when writing it.
noooooooo i thought of writing something scary before i came up to see u so shhhh :P
idk about that ur better then you think u are :')
i love you to hun :)

[mark]

i do its great :) it is good...well if u did then u must have fixed it up coz its good as
hehe ok if u say so :P
im not as good as u are :)
i love you more :)
xxxooo