juliet

poem

Juliet

 

I don’t want your diamonds neither your tears.

I’m not listening to your empty words now,

Neither wanting your whispers shoved into my ears.

Don’t tell me you love me, but show me how.

 

Believe me, I don’t need to know your name.

This is not a play, I only want your soul.

Although I’m Juliet, I want you to put Romeo to shame

And perfectly play your destined role.

 

Play me a dreamy song, that warms up the air,

Share your soul and lull me magically to sleep.

Keep me safe, while silently tugging at my hair.

Make me feel like a precious jewel you want to keep.

Author's Note

reviews are welcomed.

Reviews

[alesuriko]

Your rhyme is perfect in this piece, but your rhythm is really off and doesn't flow very smoothly. I did like the parody on Romeo & Juliet though. I really dislike that play, the worst Shakespeare's ever written (and I never insult Shakespeare). The content is really good though, despite the flow. I enjoyed the imagery and the wording.

[Just Charles]

An ode to wanting more than the "normal"

"Don't tell me you love me, but show me how"
Very good line. Sometimes words spoil the mood and moment. Depeche Mode said it best when they made the song "Enjoy the Silence."

[Huggy Bear]

Beautiful love poem.:)

[SamBug]

this was amazing. Excellent write!!!

[jason larson]

wow that was beautiful. i really liked it

[Mauricio Montoya]

great job excellent write

[Coyote Poetry]

Yes woman should be treated with love and made to feel like a Juliet. I like this poem. The desire is written strongly and the story is very good. I don't like the ending to the real story. Death leave no opening for pleasure and opportunity for a good life. A excellent poem.
Coyote

[Ashley.M.E]

this is really good, though it's not my version of Juliet or even close it kept my attention, which is honestly hard to do.

[FlawedByDesign]

I was left wanting more after reading this :(
The 4th line of the 1st stanza sucked me in and I expected the story to continue with that in mind, but the last 2 stanzas left a bit to be desired.
I appreciate the rhymes, but I think you could have done better.

Keep it up. Well done :)

[Tainted Devotion]

There's of course a lot of desire in this poem, along with so much passion. It would be a great skill to shame Romeo indeed. I can feel the heavy wanting of this "Romeo" and the need for him. Very nice.