juliet

poem

Juliet

 

I don’t want your diamonds neither your tears.

I’m not listening to your empty words now,

Neither wanting your whispers shoved into my ears.

Don’t tell me you love me, but show me how.

 

Believe me, I don’t need to know your name.

This is not a play, I only want your soul.

Although I’m Juliet, I want you to put Romeo to shame

And perfectly play your destined role.

 

Play me a dreamy song, that warms up the air,

Share your soul and lull me magically to sleep.

Keep me safe, while silently tugging at my hair.

Make me feel like a precious jewel you want to keep.

Author's Note

reviews are welcomed.

Reviews

[alesuriko]

Your rhyme is perfect in this piece, but your rhythm is really off and doesn't flow very smoothly. I did like the parody on Romeo & Juliet though. I really dislike that play, the worst Shakespeare's ever written (and I never insult Shakespeare). The content is really good though, despite the flow. I enjoyed the imagery and the wording.

[cecil]

a beautiful piece that shows your longing for attention and affection,, very beautifully penned,,Blessings..Cecil

[Patches I'm not so new..]

I enjoyed this very much like the Frost answer I think the parody on the Shakespearen play was very apropo And I believe that you have expressed the longing every lover needs to feel when with the belove-ed

[Jami Nicole]

This poem is great.
"Although I’m Juliet, I want you to put Romeo to shame" This line made me smile, it's an awesome line.
This poem is beautifully written.

Love, Jami

[Havatara]

I liked the imagery and everything, but I didn't like the way your sentences fit together. I thought it was cool that you redid Romeo and Juliet. The original play was pathetic, in my opinion. Great job.

[Tiffany]

girl you have such talent! I love your poems so beautiful and light and just aww!

[Su' Nacnetaf]

I guess what Juliet demands in this piece is fair, yet, it sounded too demanding. Nevertheless, maybe you wanted this piece to sound demanding when someone else reads it, great writing.

[NoAirToBreatheXSuffocat..]

ryhme, good!

[Ross Saunders]

This is good stuff. You work well with rhymes. I particularly the Romeo and Juliet angle you're working with here.

[Richard McLin]

(Although I’m Juliet, I want you to put Romeo to shame) Great Line.


This was a good piece. Very emotional, erotic in some ways, and very personal in others. Great work.

[MiidniightSoul]

This one is very beautifully written. You use descriptive words and don't overflow your poem with them. You know how to use them just right. Great job.