Longing for you

A poem representing the void and emptiness of loneliness

Longing

 

I would put my life on the line

For you the one who can shine

This empty life of mine

 

My heart is locked without a key

Neither love can reach me

Nor the feelings I can see

 

Though they are right there

But I only pretend to care

Smiling to the face of despair

 

Of the people I've met

I never cared to fit

Those lies are things I can't get

 

I can feel nothing

That's why I'm wondering

And for you I'm longing

Author's Note

reviews are welcomed and apreciated. ^-^

Reviews

[Life is A"Musing"]

A very relate-able write that gives readers pause to think about their own lives.
Live everyday in the love this life shares so beautifully! :D

[bluessadmood]

ohh my friend always loved to read more of your words..
my life i give for you if you could only shine this emptiness of mine
my heart been at bay,never knew love or feelings could i ever see
they are so here but i could not feel,and i smile to all the despair in me
so many i met,with them i never could fit,lies are just things i cant get
never could feel nothing so i lingered,and waited only for you
such a use of words and a way of expressing yourself
i could almost feel those pretty thoughts and how they formed
lovely write..

[Randomness!!!]

Wow thats how I've been feeling latley. This is a great poem.

[Su' Nacnetaf]

Interesting, emotional and pretty, I liked the rhyming you used all along, the verses and thoughts within are beautiful. Good writing, keep up the good work.

[Chris Harris]

Passion, simply put I love poetry that with so little words can make me feel and have a emotional response.

[Coyote Poetry]

It is hard to find your place or love in a life. We must hope things fall into place somewhere. A excellent poem.
Coyote

[deeps]

I can really feel the emotion you have written here.
I like this alot, it has a wonderful flow to it.

[Essie]

i can definitely relate to this poem. and personally, the first line of the poem definitely grabbed by attention. the idea of feelings being locked away- also presents a protective personality, which does not desire to be hurt further. in a way, the lines "my heart is locked without a key- neither love can reach me, nor the feelings I can see" presents the feeling that the speaker lives or views life like a stoic- trying to become unmoved by passion, pain, or suffering. great job.