Two Coins In The Same Fountain

I am gay.

I am a woman that romantically loves other women.

It is my life choice to love who I love,

and all I want is for people to accept that.

But at school, I'm told to stay quiet.

That people might not agree with how 

I live my life.

Words are thrown around and caught

like butterflies with ripped wings in greedy nets.

"Offensive." 

"People just don't understand it."

"You can't force that lifestyle on anyone."

I'm told by my friends that I am "equal."

That I deserve every bit of freedom I can get

simply because bright red blood

runs through blue and purple tubes beneath

the highways of my skin.

But everyone's running off road

and pretending like this is my choice.

It's the only way I want to live.

It's the only way I know how.

But still the jokes and the name calling persist.

I'm walking with a target on my back every day

because I don't want to hide who I am anymore.

I beg for people to accept me, but they don't 

because they see things on TV -- they see things on the news!

They know all about "my kind". I'm bad. 

I'm crazy.

I challenge how other live.

I'm bad.

People are quick to tell me how unfair it is,

but then turn and carve me open with harsh words and crossed eyes

because I dot my Is and cross my Ts differently

so they have to know me to the letter.

They've seen. They know.

I should be invincible.

Because I am gay.

Tell me now if you support me.

Because you should.

Because everything you see on TV is not who I am.

I am not those things.

I am me.

But I am not gay.

I am a God fearing, praise singing, Jesus loving Christian.

I am not a woman that romantically loves other women.

I've made my choice to love who I love,

and I want people to accept that.

But at school, I'm told to stay quiet.

That people might not agree with how 
I live my life.
Words are thrown around and caught
like butterflies with ripped wings in greedy nets.
"Offensive." 
"People just don't understand it."
"You can't force that lifestyle on anyone."

I'm told by my friends that I am "equal."
That I deserve every bit of freedom I can get
simply because bright red blood
runs through blue and purple tubes beneath
the highways of my skin.
But everyone's running off road
and pretending like this is my choice.

It's the only way I want to live.
It's the only way I know how.

But still the jokes and the name calling persist.

I'm walking with a target on my back every day

because I don't want to hide who I am anymore.

I beg for people to accept me, but they don't 

because they see things on TV -- they see things on the news!

They know all about "my kind". I'm bad. 

I'm crazy.

I challenge how other live.

I'm bad.

People are quick to tell me how unfair it is,

but then turn and carve me open with harsh words and crossed eyes

because I dot my Is and cross my Ts differently

so they have to know me to the letter.

They've seen. They know.

I should be invincible.

Because I am Christian.

Tell me now if you support me.

Because you should.

Because everything you see on TV is not who I am.

I am not those things.

I am me.

Do you understand?

Equality is really a double edged sword.

I must lose for them to gain.

We're butting heads and forgetting to love.

If you are not Christian, then do not agree with me

but the darkness that I've been subjected to is lit

by Christ, the savior that carried me when my knees

trembled below me.

But I am not gay.

Does that mean you love me any less?

Our worlds can live pseudo harmony as long as we'd like,

but I'm crossing the chalk-drawn line to say

"I love you! I love you, He loves you, we love you!"

And I don't have to agree with the way you see things

to love the person you are and aspire to be.

My God taught me how to love blindly honest.

You are you.

I am me.

We are two fires set in the same place,

two hands held by grace, and it's a beautiful serenity.

We are two flowers in the same field.

We are two coins in the same fountain, two wishes whispered once,

washed by blood, saved by love.

And God loves us both equally.

Author's Note

I really want people to understand this. I shouldn't get more sympathy because I am gay or because I'm Christian. We are from two seperate worlds, but we can learn to love one another on a mutual wavelength of peace. I have gay friends, and they love me just like I love them. We may not agree with each other's views, but we understand we all have hearts, blood, hopes, dreams, and wishes for the future.

My God is a God of love and mercy. Why shouldn't I try to be the same?

Reviews

[Closing Thoughts]

This poem is absolutely beautiful and I can completely relate to it. You've done it before- comparing the struggle of being a Christian to the struggle of being homosexual. I think it's quite clever. I hope you do well in your contest.

[Emunah June.]

Thank you for your kind words, Karalynn!