come fly with me in sweet shop dreams ..

from emma joy..

come fly with me in sweet-shop dreams

throw caution’s doubt into the wind,

laugh your face to pleasured lines,

come board my plain an' simple need..

let thermal toffee pleasures find -

see there, the flushed horizon glow

with coconut clouds

caressing low;

oh you with frown.. yes, you

with doubts

within your mind,

let rich selection power your wings

an' doubting heart all freedom find

with daring foil-wrapped

do or die..

 

no liquorice threads,

no brittle feel

but more

a rich confectioned place,

brim-filled with honey-almond taste

an' choc'late coated rich-ripe sips,

to lie upon your man-full lips,

they dipped

with sizzling sherbet buzz

to soon electrify a place

wherein the soar of sugary flow

must higher fly, then higher go..

for when descent is made divine

all centres left must just be mine -

in sweet-shop dreams!

Reviews

[SkinlessFrank]

My problem with sugar highs is the come down, hard and fast. Your poem makes me wonder how I can render the descent "devine".

[emmajoygreen]

Many thanks for a fun review... but suggestion:
one box of chocolates, two bars of Mars plus the liquorice all sorts are far too many. One Twix is more than enough!

[G Wade]

I know very little of poetry or poets aside from a love of Dylan Thomas (I am Welsh so I guess I have to) and Frank O'Hara but I will do my best.

Your poem appears to be a whimsical and imaginative journey through a fantastical world of sweets and dreams. The imagery is vivid and playful, invoking a sense of indulgence and fantasy. The references to “thermal toffee pleasures,” “coconut clouds,” and “choc'late coated rich-ripe sips” create a rich sensory experience, effectively immersing the reader in a sweet, dream-like world. The theme seems to revolve around escape and delight, using the metaphor of a sweet shop to explore these ideas.

It is light-hearted and inviting, with an air of whimsical adventure. The lack of strict meter or rhyme scheme allows for a more fluid expression with the dream-like quality. The language is rich with confectionery metaphors and playful expressions, “sizzling sherbet buzz” and “electrify a place” convey a sense of sensory overload and excitement. It has a sense of wonder and delight, a celebration of indulgence and freedom, using the metaphor of a sweet shop to explore these themes in an interesting way.

[emmajoygreen]

What an incredibly visual rview - tis better that my post! Guess I became somewhat indulgent as time passed, scribbling that poem! Pictures came to mind as with your, ' a sense of sensory overload and excitement. It has a sense of wonder and delight, a celebration of indulgence and freedom, using the metaphor of a sweet shop to explore these themes in an interesting way' - it's how it goes.

[Lore Keeper]

If I had diabetes I would pass out over the confectionery imagery, but I’ll have to settle for nearly drooling on the imaginary candy shelves. Very well done, quite the playful piece.

[emmajoygreen]

Meant it to be playful,meant to compensate for the oft tearful streams and/or the roars from between the lines! Plus this poem is my weekend's confession: I plead guilty for buying what is always at the front of the shop counter.. it has to be there for a reason! Thank you three times at least, Lore Keeper.. hope you are happy and well.

[Lore Keeper]

Yes and yes to happy and well, though tired and tired of certain things but that’s neither here nor there. Keep up the good work.

[emmajoygreen]

So sorry to read you're not feeling happy about 'certain things' - life can be so difficult at times. Am here if ever needed. Let's share a smile! :))))

[Simone Davis]

I really love this poem, I take from this how the world is full of magically glowing things like a magpie attracted to anything shiny, but doubt plagues us, everywhere we go, and we need to find that strength to take us to those magnificent places....Thankyou I really needed to hear this today x

[emmajoygreen]

There has to be a few words that make one lick lips and fly off and away to Never Neverland.. well, I tried! Feel free to mind-bathe in sweeties all weekend, please. Many thank yous wrapped around each and every one of them ! :)

[Silmara McGarry]

First I really love the title of your poem, is so original and fresh!!!
Then you take your readers into this sweet world of imaginative opening window after window where the view just gets better and better.
Love the end of it, in fact, the entire poem is remarkable!!!
Stay happy dearest friend 🌸

[emmajoygreen]

You leave the kindest of review, Silmara and have just written self a stick up message to come review you a billion times this coming weekend!

I'll stay happy if I'm not too exhausted after sending you so many reviews!

[Silmara McGarry]

Laughing loud:-))) You are indeed a very sweet lady! It is my absolute pleasure and only speaking the truth of what I really think of your amazing poems!
I am certainly grateful for your kindness 🌸
I must say I have so many poems written and even published that I have yet to place here, so maybe you will have time to catch your breathe..LOL ;-)))

[Amy R]

Quite interesting poem here,
"come fly with me in sweet-shop dreams" revolves around escapism and the pursuit of pleasure through imaginative experiences?

The language used is rich and sensory, filled with vivid imagery and playful diction. Words like "thermal toffee pleasures," "coconut clouds," and "sizzling sherbet buzz" evoke a sense of sweetness and delight, creating a playful and whimsical tone. I enjoyed your word play a lot.

Also it suggests to us that through imagination /deep thoughts and joy, one can find freedom and fulfillment.

Nicely done.
-Amy

[emmajoygreen]

Many thanks, Amy. The poem is an old one re-jigged a little and from my previous given name, emmajoy. It's nice to offer a little fun every so often, don't you think. Keep well and happy, my friend, take care.

[Amy R]

That's right, a little fun is always good.
You're welcome Emma 🦋