Anxiety

the quickening of a heart beat I struggle to recognize as my own,

creeps up my throat, encompassing my body

and no I cannot simply “relax”

for this has never been a choice

nervous tremors shake through my fingers,

and all I feel is a loss of control

I am crumbling, exposing everything I fight to hide

so yes this is a “big deal”

what for you is an everyday occurrence,

can threaten my carefully built walls

the heat that seems to dominate my face

should not be described as cute or funny

for if you only knew how it phases me

do not simply write me off as awkward or quirky

because this attack on my body

is not a personality trait