Like a car crash unhappened.

A quick stretch for NanoWriMo.

I was all there,
you were there. Everything was perfect and
set. I didn't leave any doubts and
you didn't leave any room.
(Sometimes looking at a beautiful woman is
just like looking at the face of death and you say
oh God oh God oh God (letmepeek?)). I
drank down cigarettes and the
pastimes of the meek. I found the
heaving in/out of your chest to be
a car crash unhappened but all there. I
saw the glass on the ground and the air
bags deployed and the hair sweaty underneath
or the telling red lines. I saw it there and
it didn't
happen.
I found the amazing in that moment when I realized
that it's the bite after a long starvation or
the breath after a drowning, you feel it fill you up
but it's never really as good as you want to
expect and you're left
with the emptiness that
never quite goes.

Reviews

[Kgosi]

ok jo... what tip are you on bcoz... your writing in intrestinly good, " I found the amazing in that moment when I realized that it's the bite after a long starvation or the breath after a drowning, you feel it fill you up
but it's never really as good as you want to expect and you're left with the emptiness that never quite goes." i enjoyed reading this peace hope theres still mopre like this one>

[Collette]

Interesting...I get an odd mix of emotions from reading this. Hope, longing, unfulfillment. Strange comparisons, Emel. Still, the flow works nicely. I felt myself naturally going along without any extra effort...it really just pops. These lines made me go "Really?!"

(Sometimes looking at a beautiful woman is
just like looking at the face of death and you say
oh God oh God oh God (letmepeek?)).

Hope you were lying...that's flattering for womankind, in a way. A strange way. Then again, I do enjoy the strange. And you deliver it so nicely. No bows, bells, or ribbons. Just poetic intoxication. Thanks for sharing, keep writing.